14 April 2009

April 14, 1974 – 2:00 AM

Greetings Dear Readers,

That was a long time ago or so it seems today. Two events in history happened on that day that are significant to me. The first touched many lives before it touched mine. It is surrounded by controversy and passion. Some guys sitting around chose to improve on a gaming system that became known as Dungeons and Dragons.

I embraced this game in early 1975 and was hooked. I was given a set of the early books as a birthday gift for my 15th birthday. My pen name was actually the name of the Paladin I created that year. The name in my mind is older than that, but it was dear enough to me to be assigned to a Holy Knight and I had not yet adopted it as my nom de plume’. I have played this game off and on since 1975. My Paladin, Aramis turned 34 this past March. He is off trying to rescue someone from something and not feeling his age nearly as much as I am.

This game probably saved my mind. It was great escape when I was young and kept me in friends for many years. The other significant event of April 14, 1974 is also still with me. At times I thought that this other thing would steal away my love of Dungeons and Dragons but instead it has given me cause to see my much loved game as a way to be good to others.

In the wee hours of April 14th so long ago, after arguing, struggling, and much kicking and fussing I gave up my hatred of God for all he had supposedly done to me and accepted what he had done for me. After a long and loving conversation, patiently answering all my prideful questions, a man name Ray asked me if I was ready to quit questioning and simply put my faith in Christ for my salvation and my life. I was so tired from running away from the love of Christ that I said yes.

I had spent years angry at God, running from his love, and using his name for my own purposes. I was taking drugs and my mom did not know. I went away to a weekend retreat with a church group. My intent was to ruin their reputation by taking my own life. I had the drugs and I would take them and begin a long swim on the lake at the camp we attended. I could slip quietly away from my miserable life and not care what happened to me.

Ray saw I was in trouble and on the night I intended to take my dark swim he reached out to me and hung on to me emotionally and mentally until I saw my need for Christ. The road since that early April morning has been rough and smooth, joyful and sorrowful, but the promise Ray made me that night has always been true. He promised me that Christ would always be there for me and he has. Faith is all that sustains me as I mark this year’s spiritual birthday whilst walking in a dark and lonely place. I have been a Christ follower for 35 years now. I feel very tired sometimes but know that following is all that I can do.

The journey has more joy than sorrow and more friends than enemies. Along the way I get to encourage someone every once in a while. Today I was able to reconnect with a fellow traveler I have missed. I did not expect to be walking alone at this point in my life, but Christ is faithful and he allows me time to try and catch up when I get distracted. The journey is real for me and sometimes I think I can just begin to see the lights of home. I will keep walking and close out this milestone with the same thing I always do.

I wish you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn, Paladin and Pilgrim

2 comments:

  1. That is a side of you I didn't know. It's funny though, how different our pasts can be, and yet some of the darker stories strike an uncomfortably familiar chord in our own past. People are far more similar to one another than we would like to believe. How different would the world be--how differently would we treat each other--if we all knew everyone else's secrets? We are surrounded by brothers and sisters who share our burden and unrevealed pains, not strangers who couldn't possibly understand us.

    I am grateful that Ray reached out to you in your darkest hour. God's plan for you was far from over. I pray that some day I will have the same strength, compassion, and intuition as Ray, so I can reach out to others in crisis who need help and love and desperately need Christ's grace.

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  2. This is a great story of your salvation and to have another that sensed your pain in your darkest hour and led you to Christ.

    If only other non believers would take a smple step to turn to God how much more valuable their life would be.

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