From Dirges to Anthems - Castles

Greetings Dear Reader,

Castles tall, I built them all

But I dream that I'm trapped in the basement – Dan Fogelberg

One of the things that is always a factor during the times I struggle with who I am is pride.  I think about the things I have done and somehow believe it is I that am owed.  This is always wrong.  These lines from the song used to be what I clung onto in order to feel that I was owed something by those around me. 

In transitioning this song I instead see this as a reminder that I have built nothing.  Anything I have and anything I am is a gift from God.  Anything I think I have built is because of God’s provision.  If all that I have is God’s and achieved through his will and grace then nothing can be taken from me.  It does not matter what I think I am owed or who I wish would acknowledge me.  What matters is that seek solace in Christ. 

The feelings I have may be genuine but I must consider the source of those feelings.  If they are generated by the thought that I wish someone to act in a certain way toward me then I am unjustly placing expectations on them.  I have no right to do this, even if the expectation is just and right.  If I depend on anything but Christ for my sustenance emotional or otherwise I am imposing my needs on others.

No matter what I have built or how I feel about the result of that building, it is not my place to place any expectation on others.  We do this to try and manufacture the feelings we need or to exact a measure of control over others.  We do this to get needs met that are not truly met when we force the issue.  No matter what I build or where I am in the building of it, Christ is there and that is all that matters.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn                              

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."