22 August 2015

Home to House – Not a Home

Greetings Dear Reader,

Today the furniture arrives.  Today I say goodbye to the house that has been my home.   I am weary from the lifting, carrying, and placing.  I am beginning to shape the layout of my new abode. 

My definition of home has always been the people not the place.   My new abode will be only me.  It will not be a home.  People have tried to tell me that I can make it one but that is not how I work.  It is the sharing of the space with those I love that makes it work for me.

The hard deck is sound.  I will find solace in Christ and cherish the moments that other choose to share with me.  At the end of the day, however, I will lay down alone.  I cannot understand why God has chosen this for my journey but I trust him.  I do not like it but I will walk what I must.

I have all that I need in terms of provision and supply.  In some ways I have too much.  A project will be to reduce.  Possessions are not my friends or family.  I do not know how long I will be in this place but my hope is to leave with less. 

For now I must steel myself for the long dark; the evenings of coming back to an empty place.  No matter the revels or events the end is the same.  I will not use others to avoid this Moria but the goblins and Balrog within will lurk in the shadows nightly. 

I will follow the light and limit the darkness.  I will follow in faith that I am not alone in my solitude.  I would never willingly choose this but it is here.  I will do my best to walk the path well through the long dark of this journey.   

Loose Ends – Dan Fogelberg

Climbing a mountain in darkness
Stranded alone on the ledge
Every attempt that I make to hold on
Pushes me nearer the edge
Sensing the changes impending
My thoughts are diffused by despair
I feel like I'm swimming straight up underwater
Desperately racing for air
I'm racing for air

And the chords struck at birth grow more distant
Yet, we strike them again and again
And we plead and we pray for a glimmer of day
As the night folds its wings and descends
Exposing the loose ends

Surrounding myself with possessions
I surely have more than I need
I don't know if this is justice hard earned
Or simply a matter of greed
A matter of greed

And the chords struck at birth grow more distant
Yet, we strike them again and again
And we plead and we pray for a glimmer of day
As the night folds its wings and descends
Exposing the loose ends

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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