03 May 2010

A Time for Silence

Greetings Dear Reader,

“I’m not a man who likes to swear but I never cared for the sound of being alone.” – Neil Diamond

I know that I have not posted for a couple of weeks. I have been shoulder deep in my current novel which is a good thing, but I have neglected you a little which is a dire thing. I ask your forgiveness and will fit you into my schedule more regularly.

Ever since I was a small child I have had trouble being alone. Things from my childhood caused me to spend much time alone and housebound. Added to that, being alone and in a silent place feels like a great pressure on my chest. The cause is not nearly as important as the effect. Most of my adult life, I have struggled greatly with being by myself. Over the last year, however, this has changed. Circumstances and events have forced me into situations where I have had to be alone. As I grew more able to handle the solitude I began to venture into short times of complete silence as well.

A couple of weeks ago my daughter Christmas was away on a spring mission trip. Both my sons were busy pursuing their own lives and I faced a truly empty house for an entire week. Later in the week, my eldest son, Maxim would say that I was acting like a puppy. What I found of value were the couple of times where I ventured into real silence. At one point I did not speak a word out loud to anyone for thirty-six hours.

The jewel in the venture is that it moved me into the place where I actually valued the silence. I found that thinking was clearer and that after some time the things that plague me in those moments gave way to quiet times of inner conversation with God that was rich and rewarding. By not drowning out my inner voice I was able to confront some things that I would normally avoid. The result was some honest viewing of the discrepancies between who I am and who I am to become in Christ. I have incorporated times for this into my routine and the silence give lease to valued insight and a deep communion with Christ.

I will be careful not to be silent in this venue again but I will find silence when necessary so that my speaking to you may become richer.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every scribe who has become a disciple of the kingdom of heaven is like a home owner. He brings new and old things out of his treasure store."