Honest Words – Yes and No

Greetings Dear Reader,

This is quite simple but we make it so complex.  “Yes” and “No” used to be enough to seal a deal.  They are words that carry great weight.  We agree or disagree.  We commit of do not commit.  I am troubled that we no longer see yes and no and commitments.

Jesus was very clear that vows and oaths should not be necessary.  He was clear the yes and no are honest words that are binding.  When a simple yes or no does not seal the matter there is a problem.

So when asked about anything we should be able to honestly say yes or no and stand by it.  Instead we build excuses into our answers.  We give noncommittal answers so that we can weasel out later.  We even outright lie.

Over the years I have students give me a resounding yes when asked if they were going to be in class, do the work, or make up a quiz.  They knew when they said yes that they were lying.  The entire idea of an honest yes loses its value when we dissemble.

The “Yes” of marriage vows becomes a maybe when things get hard.  That same yes has no value when we are dragged away by other pursuits.  The “Yes” we give is a bond whether we wish it or not.  

Why I am asked anything I have a choice.   Once I agree to something I have given up that choice.  We do not get this.  We no longer really live it.  I must be someone whose yes and no are a bond.  I must do as I say I will do.  People must be able to depend on me.  I cannot follow Christ if I do not keep my word.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

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Honest Words - Sizes

Greetings Dear Reader,

As some of you know one of my favorite things is to have a good cup of fresh brewed coffee in the morning.  I roast my own beans and find that I enjoy those cups the best. I buy greens beans from a honest and equitable grower (I refuse to fall into the “free trade” and “sourced” vernacular.) From time to time, however, I must acquire coffee at one of the places that insists on turning a good cup of coffee into a hot milkshake. 

In a world where one is being forced to pay four or five dollars for a cup of coffee served by a “barista” it is very difficult to see the sense in renaming sizes to exclusive and confusing words.  In an effort to not be too recalcitrant regarding social convention, I will purchase hot milkshakes for my Daughter, Christmas before church. 

The place where I am most often forced to obtain my hot milkshakes is at the center of town very close to the large university in my town.  The Baristas who are sober enough to work the Sunday morning shift work their revenge by insisting that one learn their size secret code.  I have trouble recalling which size gets me the most coffee for my money. 

In my mind it should be as simple as ordering “a large coffee to go”.  I try saying that and the Barista instantly marks me for a coffee Luddite.  “Do you mean ‘Grande’ or ‘Venti’?”  She asks this in a tone that is both impatient and dismissive.  I respond by saying that I would like the largest cup of “just plain coffee” that I can get.

There are three “Baristas” behind the counter.  As if on cue they all look at each other and smirk. “You mean you want a ‘Trenta’,” she smiles in that tone that says she is poking out your eyes with her long-handled spoon.

I smile back and say, “If that is a large coffee then that is what I want.”  She, however,  needs me to say the word and repeats herself.  “So you want a ‘Trenta’?” 

I realize that if I do not push the love of God into my voice I am going to be impatient with this underpaid, overworked server.  Also I can hear mummers behind me as the line of people just want me to say the right magic words so they can get to the barista and order their over-priced hot milkshakes.

I refuse to say the word but I nod in agreement.  That will be fine. I think it is over.  I am so very wrong.  I must answer questions about where the coffee came from and the degree to which I wish the coffee to have been roasted.  Please tell me what is wrong with just asking me if I want a small, medium, large, or extra-large coffee?  I do not care which beans you use as long as it is not that cat poop coffee. 

Normal size names are honest words.  I don’t care if my coffee is free range or grass fed.  You do not need to inform me that each bean was given a holistic naming ceremony before you ground it to dust.  I care that growers are treated honestly and that they get an honest price for their product.  I will participate in the purchase of honest-trade coffee (I refuse to say “fair-trade” as that is not an honest term). 

I paid the ten dollars for out two cups of coffee.  I waited for the barista to do her voodoo on Christmas’ hot milkshake.  Sure enough the coffee is ready and the young lady delivering it calls our names.  She has trouble with mine.  Written on my cup is an attempt at spelling my name.  Even my spell check is arguing with the word “Eramiss”.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

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Honest Words - Ugly

Greetings Dear Reader,

First step is to be very clear that I would never condone calling a human being ugly.  That lacks the kindness and love that is to be the basis for all my communication.  With the exception of referring to mankind (yes I realize that some of you do not like that word either.  Research the actual etymology of the word before you judge me.) there are some perfectly good uses for the word ugly.

There are things that are ugly.  I am not content to call a Blob fish visually challenging.  This fish looks like someone melted Jimmy Durante.  It is honest to say that his creature is ugly.  That does not mean that God made an error in creating it.  It is just ugly.  For the record I would be opposed to melting Jimmy Durante.

Some things people call art are ugly.  There is a multimillion dollar sculpture in this town that looks like a pile of rabbit poop.  I am not sure if poop is acceptable but it is the word I intended to use.  No matter how you put it there is some stuff that is supposed to be art that is ugly to the perception of some.  Ugly is the only word that works.

There is also ugly fruit.  It is even named Ugli.  It is like a badly formed grapefruit.  Ugly is an honest word.  It communicates.  I like it and will use it.  I will try not to act ugly when I do but it is an honest word and has a place in communication with others.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Honest Words – First Thoughts

Greetings Dear Reader,

Recently I was watching the first season of Parenthood.  I realize I am late to the party on this one but other things have my primary attention.  In episode 3, The Deep End of the Pool, Zeek Braverman played by Craig T. Nelson said something the struck a profound cord in me.  He and his daughter are looking for car parts.  He says, “I love how they call it ‘automotive recycling’ now. What's wrong with ‘junk’? Junk's an honest word.”

It seems our culture needs to rename everything to something that sounds green, socially acceptable, or politically correct.  This grates on me in a way that I find more irritating every day.  I just told someone yesterday when he was struggling to find the right word that he never needs to be politically correct with me.  He seemed so relieved. 

In a world where we need honest communication we instead shroud things in an ambiguity of minced words.  Layoffs become “reduction in force.”  I was recently told that I could not use the term “brainstorm” because it may offend those with cerebral disorders.  Instead I was instructed to use the term “thought shower”.   It is good that my inner clutch was working because my thought response surely needed a shower.

In addition to someone trying to control what I say, I am truly opposed to being told that perfectly honest words need to be replaced because someone might not like the words I choose to use.  I really get steamed (forgive me if I am offending people who use steam for some arcane purpose) when someone tries to tell me what I mean by what I say. As an author I believe in and will die to defend authorial intent.

I am going to explore some words that I feel are perfectly good words and that I intend to go on using.  I will try to be humorous but may drift into the curmudgeonly, recalcitrant, and irascible.  Words are so vital to me and the way in which we interact.  I tend to get very emotional about this issue.

My goal is to honestly examine how I communicate and assure that I am not being obtusely offensive.  It is also to remember why I use the words I do.  Words have meaning.  That meaning is assigned by the user.  I need to assure that the words I use truly communicate my intent and my heart.

This will hopefully be fun.  Feel free to interact and ask questions.  Feel free to disagree. Mostly remember that this journey is for me to learn to be a better human.  I realize that “human” has “man” in it but I assure my intent is to include all genders in that word.  I do not want my love and kindness to be hindered by words that do not communicate that.  Sometimes though I might just need to come with a warning label. 

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

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