Empty Chairs

Greetings Dear Readers

This morning as I was writing in another venue, I realized that some things have slipped into the past that I truly miss. As I sit here drawing on my pipe and musing on the encroaching winter, I wonder what God’s purpose in some of my wilderness time is. I feel a deep loneliness for some things that I often do not ponder.

Today I miss sitting in church with my oldest son as if I were losing a limb or someone had died. I have noticed of late that I look for him during the sermon, remembering how he used to get so intense about what was being said. Even when he was a small boy he knew that what came from the teaching pastor could be used to draw him closer to Christ.

His thoughts on church have changed. His walk with Christ is strong buy I rarely get to be in church with him. It is ironic as I attend a church that he asked me to go to with him. My longing is not for him in a spiritual way, but as a father who loves his son and benefits from his insights. I know that going to church is not the measure of your heart toward Christ, but today I feel and intense loneliness for the closeness he and I shared over this event.

My failures in life and his growth have lessened the time we share in this practice. With more Sundays behind me than ahead of me, I just feel that today’s would be much more beautiful with a conversation about the sermon with my son. Fathers I urge you to invest the time in your children now. Sooner that one can imagine, sons become men with families of their own. The void left when they grow up is vast and hungry, even when it is natural and the result them just becoming adults.

For today, I will look at the empty chair and remember the beautiful boy scribbling in my Bible and telling me what the pastor means. For today I will remember standing in the pulpit and him running up during the sermon to tell me he wanted to help. For today I will recall him reaching out to lost teen agers when he was only eight so that they could have what he had.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn