Greetings Dear Readers,
I am getting asked quite often this week about how I feel. As a cautionary note to all who are considering ending a marriage I will try to answer honestly. Please note that how one feels is not nearly as important as the lessons one learns from those feelings and how one follows Christ because of or in spite of those feelings.
I feel angry – but in that anger I refuse to give place to the evil one or fail to forgive Avalon.
I feel robbed – I was promised a life with someone I love and it was taken without my leave – but it is taught me to depend on nothing but Christ
My heart is broken – You cannot accidentally break someone’s heart but it has made it easier for Christ to get into the places he wishes.
I feel betrayed – With a kiss, with offers of friendship – but I will not hold the sin again her.
I feel abandoned - I was and am willing to face and deal with any of my own sin to make our marriage whole.
I feel renewed – I know that in the midst of my pain I am more focused on Christ than ever.
I feel hope – I know that God knows what he is doing and will do my best to center on the fact that he is good and wants what is best for me.
I feel grief – No so much for my loss any longer but for Avalon because she is so far from the truth in this and still believes the lies that allow her to violate our marriage.
It costs so much to end a marriage. I know that Christ has used my situation to his own purposes. I know that others follow Christ more closely because of what has happened to me. I know that others tend the garden that is their marriage better because of this. I know that I will find the path Christ wishes me to walk if I just keep my focus on him. There is peace in my pain and my children have been there for me every moment. My church has supported me in amazing ways. Christ has made himself so evident in my life. Tomorrow I will stand before a judge who will tear asunder what God joined together. It will hurt.
Please pray for me.
Wishing you joy in the journey,
Aramis Thorn
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I feel deeply for what you are going through. I have never been in this exact situation but I am in a situation in which many of the feelings you have shared are ones that I have gone through. I cannot give up, I will not give up no matter what the cost I will make it through. I know you will too. I may not believe in the same things as you or have been down the same exact road I have been going down a similar road and your post resonates deeply with me. You are in my thoughts.
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