10 October 2013

Songs That Sustain Me – Be Thou My Vision

Greetings Dear Reader,

When I first heard this song in my teens it gripped me and has never let go.  The melody is ancient as well and is both haunting and light.  You can often catch me singing this song a I move through my day.  It is one of those that chases away the pain and sorrow for me.

If I examine the words honestly they truly reflect who I wish to become as I move toward Christ and his likeness.  I want God to be my whole portion and felicity.  I want to give my life completely away to him and his purposes for that life.  In this song is all the submission, protection, and provision one needs.

Everything about following Christ is wrapped up in where I look.  When my eyes are on Christ then I follow well.  When my eyes are on me then I do not.  Seems so natural that I walk where I look.

Words: Dallan Forgail (6th Century)

Be thou my vision, O Lord of my heart,
Be all else but naught to me, save that thou art;
Thou my best thought in the day and the night,
Both waking and sleeping, thy presence my light.

Be thou my wisdom; be thou my true word,
Be thou ever with me, and I with thee Lord;
Be thou my great Father, and I thy true son;
Be thou in me dwelling, and I with thee one.

Be thou my breastplate, my sword for the fight;
Be thou my whole armour, be thou my true might;
Be thou my soul's shelter, be thou my strong tower:
O raise thou me heavenward, great Power of my power.

Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise:
Be thou mine inheritance now and always;
Be thou and thou only the first in my heart;
O Sovereign of Heaven, my treasure thou art.

High King of Heaven, thou Heaven's bright sun,
O grant me its joys after victory is won!;
Great heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be thou my vision, O Ruler of all.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

09 October 2013

Songs That Sustain Me – Jesus, Lover of my Soul

Greetings Dear Reader,

I first encountered this song in High School when a man from the Philippines sang it in chapel.  The song is one of over a thousand hymns written by Charles Wesley in the eighteenth century.  It is my favorite of his.

This song serves to remind me of the grace and protection that I have in Christ.  It reassures me that I have a
refuge and place of safety when life is difficult and painful.  I have sung this song often whilst weeping.  It helps me to remember all that Christ offers to support and comfort me.

It also is good for me to remember that all of this is because of God’s love and grace.  It is out of love for me that comfort and care are available.  I have tried other refuge and it just does not work.   


Charles Wesley

Jesus, lover of my soul,
Let me to thy bosom fly,
While the nearer waters roll,
While the tempest still is high.

Hide me, O my Savior, hide,
Till the storm of life is past;
Safe into the haven guide;
O receive my soul at last.

Other refuge have I none,
Hangs my helpless soul on thee;
Leave, ah! leave me not alone,
Still support and comfort me.

All my trust on thee is stayed,
All my help from thee I bring;
Cover my defenseless head
With the shadow of thy wing.

Wilt Thou not regard my call?
Wilt Thou not accept my prayer?
Lo! I sink, I faint, I fall-
Lo! on Thee I cast my care;

Reach me out Thy gracious hand!
While I of Thy strength receive,
Hoping against hope I stand,
Dying, and behold, I live.

Thou, O Christ, art all I want,
More than all in thee I find;
Raise the fallen, cheer the faint,
Heal the sick, and lead the blind.

Just and holy is thy name,
I am all unrighteousness;
False and full of sin I am;
Thou art full of truth and grace.

Plenteous grace with thee is found,
Grace to cover all my sin;
Let the healing streams abound,
Make and keep me pure within.

Thou of life the fountain art,
Freely let me take of thee;
Spring thou up within my heart;
Rise to all eternity.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

08 October 2013

Songs That Sustain Me – The Prayer of Saint Francis

Greetings Dear Reader,

This is one of those songs that reaches so deeply into me.  We cannot verify that Francis of Assisi ever knew these words in any language.  The first verifiable copy of it dates to the World War One era.  I believe it does reflect the character of the monk who shares the name.

What this song does for me is remind me who I am to be as a follower of Jesus Christ.  I truly wish to always have these attitudes.  I wrote extensively about this during the summer of 2011.  I probably sing or listen to this song daily.  I cannot say for sure but I am almost certain. 

The link below is to Sarah MacLauchlan’s very haunting rendition of the song.  I will listen to it over and over when I am struggling with an aspect of the life it asks me to live.  I want to be someone who sows love, pardon, truth, faith, hope, light, and joy in others.  I wish to console, understand, love, give, and pardon others in a way that evidences that I have died to my own wants and desires.  I want others to know they are valued and loved. 

This simple short song sustains me when I am struggling at being what I should be in Christ.  Give it a listen and let me know what you think. 


Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace;
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is error, the truth;
Where there is doubt, the faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
And where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master, Grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled, as to console;
To be understood, as to understand;
To be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

07 October 2013

Songs That Sustain Me – First Thoughts

Greetings Dear Reader,

My Son Maxim has often told me that he uses his shower time as prayer time.  I think that is a beautiful thing.  Yesterday morning as I was singing in the shower I realized just how important morning music in my mind benefits me.  It helps me center my day.  There are certain songs; most of them ancient that flow through me when I allow it. 

This river of music reminds me what matters.  It focuses my spirit on what I am to be and to become as a follower of Christ.  Certain songs have both and enveloping melody and stone solid lyrics that remind me how to think on life and the world. My intent is to think through the impact of those songs outside of the reverie of my morning ritual.

I often walk through the lyrics of songs.  These few that I will consider are songs intended to bolster faith and spirit.  As we move toward All Hallows Eve and All Saints Day they are good things to carry as I journey.  Everything about this journey is an attempt to focus on being like Christ.  Music is very powerful in my  life and so as I walk I sing.  Sing along with me if you wish.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

05 October 2013

The Readjustment Blues

Greetings Dear Reader,

Recently someone I care for deeply returned from hiking the Appalachian Trail.  She has been talking and blogging about the experience.  The reading is quite insightful.  One of the things she talks about is the adjustment back to “civilization”. 

As I read her writing and we talked about this I realized just how often we have to adjust to major changes that create culture shock for us.  Most of those changes are out of our control and sometimes even forced upon us by the choices of others, changes in society, or the movement of life.  Our jobs, our living space, and our social circles can all be impacted.  We realize things about who we are and what we wish to become as we move into the new surroundings.

I have come to realize that adjusting to changes for me requires a constant.  A constant in the storm is hard to find.  In the past I have used routines and ritual to be that constant and this always fails.  I have tried placing that burden on others and that only damages relationships.  The only constant I ever find is Christ.  The only constant of which he assures me is himself. 

As I adjust to changes the only thing that I can control in those changes is my response; who I am in the midst of those changes.  If I am anything other than someone who follows Christ with all his heart then I am going to get it wrong.  Some of the changes I walk through hurt deeply and bring me great sadness.  I cannot control what happens and to fight the changes requires me to violate my faith.

So what can I do?  I can see that even the pain and sadness of readjustment can bring me closer to Christ.  I can control the only thing that is truly in my control.  Who I am and how I conduct myself is all that I have.  That is all that I can control.  How I treat others and what I do to enrich their lives is all that I can give out of my brokenness.   If Christ is the only constant in the storm and that is all I have, then I have everything.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

04 October 2013

81 – The Fourth Inning

81 – The Fourth Inning
By Aramis Thorn
Here is the fourth installment of the short story as promised, Enjoy
At this writing post-season baseball is under way.  My Braves lost last night.  Hope is the eternal flame of all who love baseball. 

Fourth Inning


Warm Up
  
Joe takes the mound and lazily stretches as he waits for Jack.  While the bat boy straps on Jack’s shin guards Jack puts his hand back in the ice bucket.  As he trots to the plate Jack notices how relaxed the kid looks.  He squats down for the eight and realizes that he is losing concentration.  What his years have taught him is that if you think about records and chasing them you lose performance.  Jack is a man of reason and also a romantic.  He is just superstitious enough to show respect to long held baseball traditions.

He takes the eight and vows to focus on pitches and not mention anything to his young pitcher.  The next two batters could be historical.  Jack chuckles inwardly.  Historical is three immaculate inning.  He has never witnessed nor dared to dream anything like it.   Every pitch matters.  He throws the last warm up pitch down to second base and it makes its way around the horn, eventually returning to Joe.

Pitch 28

Stretch Franklin ambles from the on deck circle to the plate.  He looks down at Jack, “So I could be the tie.  Can’t let that happen.”

Jack looks up and smiles, “We will see Stretch.”  Once again, and not for the last time Jack forces thoughts about records from his head mind.

Garner Patch is aware too.  He brushes the plate and takes extra care in doing it.  Returning to his spot behind Jack he calls, “Let’s go.  This is the stuff that gets in the way of baseball.  Then again what would baseball be without it?”

Jack signals to Joe for a curve ball, outside.  Joe nods as if nothing is going on but pitching.  The release is perfect.  The ball flies true.  Stretch takes the pitch.

“Steeerike one,” spits Patch.

The crowd roars.  Joe looks perplexed but smiles wanly.

Jack allows hope but not distraction.  He tosses the ball back to Joe. 

The red numbers read 91 mph.

Pitch 29

Jack settles and signals.  Stretch may think he cannot allow something but he has trouble with the curve.  Someone’s day is about to be made one way or the other.  He calls for curve, same place and same speed.  This time Stretch swings.  This time he misses.

“Steeerike two,” Calls Patch.

Again the roar is deafening.  Joe looks in to Jack for explanation.  Jack points to the K’s above his left shoulder hoping to avoid anything complicated or distracting.  Joe shrugs and hands out his glove for the ball.  Jack is pleased with that response.


Pitch 30

Jack ponders the next pitch. Stretch has waited a curve and chased one.  He will expect a curve.  He knows that Jack knows his weakness.  Jack calls for the changeup.  Joe shakes it off.  Jack offers the breaking ball.  Joe nods. Jack realizes that Joe comprehends the batter’s attitude and weaknesses.

Stretch verbally pokes at Jack, “Having trouble getting the kid to listen?”

Jack rarely says anything to batters to goad them.  He cannot resist.  “We’re just agreeing on the right pitch to get you out. Do you feel lucky punk?”  He says this last part in his best Dirty Harry voice.

Garner Patch chuckles.  Joe stretches, winds, and deals.  The pitch breaks perfectly.  Stretch reacts perfectly from Jack’s perspective.  He swings early and high.  The light between ball and bat is a safe two inches.

Garner Patch’s call of “Steeerike three” is drowned out by the crowd as it cheers what it already knows.  Joe Zander has just tied the consecutive strike out record for the major leagues.  Only a few comprehend that he has done it on only 27 pitches.  Joe is also one third of the way to a fourth immaculate inning. 

Pitch 31

Jack ponders how grateful he is that this is a home game.  If this record is to be broken it should be broken here on the field where he has caught pitches for twenty years.  It is also the right evening for it.  It is the first cool evening of what has been a torpid summer.  Record heat and humidity have plagued the southern states.  The humidity lingers but the cool breeze moving from the visiting dugout to left field is refreshing.

Paul Simmons moves into the box without a word.  No player on either team misses what is happening here.  None of them has ever seen it.  No one is still playing who was playing when Tom Seaver struck out ten in a row in the spring of 1970.  No one has ever had three immaculate innings.  Joe is one strike out into his fourth and one batter away from the record.

Jack looks up at Simmons.  The batter’s toes are barely in the box and he is leaning in toward the plate.  He looks toward the mound but mutters self-importantly to Jack, “Either way I am part of baseball history forever just because I am at bat.”

Morris says nothing and signals fastball, low.  He leaves the heat setting up to Joe.  So much of it is up to Joe.  So much of baseball is about control.  It is about the holding and giving of control.  It is allowing the physics to control things in between.  Baseball is about a game that dances with the laws of the universe.  It is why God is at the center of every game whether he is invited or not.  Joe is in control of the moment.  As he winds the stadium grows silent.  The four seam fastball leaves the hand right where it should.  Jack knows it will hurt.

Simmons swings too high and too late. 

“Stee…” Garner Patch is drowned out by the cacophony that erupts from the stands. 

Jack was correct.  It hurt.  He needs to slow things down and the cheers will help.  As he tosses the ball back he eyes the pitch clock.  103 mph.

Pitch 32

Simmons is set up with the fastball.  Now it is time to get him off of the plate.  Jack signals curve, inside, and slow.  Joe nods his understanding.  So far the kid has put the ball exactly where Jack wants it on every pitch.  This one is no different.

The kid pauses at the top of his stretch and then deals.  The ball appears to be headed right down the pipe.  Jack has set up center to encourage the deception.  They cash in on Simmons’ trouble hitting curve balls and the fact that the last two he saw were hot curves. Simmons swings early.

“Steeerike two,” calls Patch but only Jack can hear him above the din.

Jack smiles but says nothing.  The pitch was perfect.  He is sure Tom Seaver is about to be second in the history books. Jack forces the thought from his head until he tosses the ball back to Joe.  Joe actually winks at him.

The red clock reads 82 mph. 

Pitch 33

The batter looks down at Jack in disbelief.  He also defiantly crowds the plate again.  This is just what Jack needs.  He signals for the slider, inside, high.  Joe grins and nods.  Joe winds and hurls.

This pitch and the ensuing few seconds will be replayed over and over by all the major news networks.  It will be the lead on most local news stations.  In Black River Falls, WI, Joe’s home town, it will take up most of the time for the local news sports segment.

The ball moves from hand to mitt in .477 seconds.  Simmons thinks the pitch is high and inside.  He backs away.  The ball breaks down and toward the plate.  Simmons realizes too late he has been duped.  A heartbeat of silence follows the sound of the ball landing in Jack’s mitt.

“Steeerike  three, you’re out,” calls Garner Patch.

52,206 fans agree and make their voices heard.

Jack smiles as Simmons argues the call.  Simmons appeals to first and the first base umpire, Rowland Jenner signals him out.

The applause, cheers, and whistles last a full ninety-eight seconds.  Everyone in the stadium is standing.  Joe steps two step off the mound and politely tips his hat to the fans. 

The clock records the record breaking pitch at 97 mph.

Pitch 34

As Simmons retreats to the dugout Jack signals for the ball boy.  He trots over with three new balls for the umpire.  Jack is still holding the last pitched ball.  Garner Patch looks toward the catcher for explanation.

“We are going to be changing balls a little more often I think.  I won’t send the ball around the horn after the strikeouts if I can give it to the ball boy.  No game delay and we preserve some history.” explains Jack.

He looks down at the kid who is the ball boy.  Tim Olson, son of the team’s batting coach looks up at the catcher waiting for instructions.  “Take this ball and keep it safe for Joe,” begins Jack.  “Find me one of those sharp black markers we use for signing stuff.  Make sure it is a new one.  Bring it to me after the next batter.  Get an empty ball bag too.  Come see me after every batter until I say different.  Remember Tim, no one else touches this ball.”

Tim nods in awe.  He knows that he has just been given a bit part in the drama of true baseball history.  He will play it to the rafters.  He stuffs the ball in his uniform pocket and goes back to his chair by the dugout.  As soon as he can get the bat boy’s attention he asks him to cover while he carries out Jack’s instructions.


Vick Houseman waits patiently for the exchange to complete before stepping into the box.  Respectfully he tips his cap to Joe Zander.  He looks back and down to Jack, “You know it is my job to try and break this up, right?”

Jack smiles at the third baseman.  “I do.  You know it is my job not to let you, right?”

Jack signals changeup.

Joe throws the changeup.

Vick swings too early and too low.

“Steeerike one,” calls Patch.

“This is getting monotonous,” observes Vick.

“The fans don’t think so,” counters Jack.

Jack tosses back the ball pondering the number of consecutive strikes the kid has thrown.  He is sure they are setting new records with every pitch now.  Jack is also sure he needs to discipline his thoughts.  He relays his thoughts on the record to Vick.  The batter is unimpressed.

The red clock reads 77 mph.

Pitch 35

Jack ruminates over Vick’s last at bat.  They worked him changeup, changeup, fastball.  Repeating this with a hitter like Vick would be a mistake.  Jack calls for the curve, hot and outside.  Joe obliges.


The ball assures the batter that it is a narrow hittable off speed pitch.  It tails away to the outside just ahead of Vick’s swing.

Garner Patch calls, “Steeerike  two, batter.”

Jack looks up at his friend, “Still bored?”

The speed clock completes the tale: 93 mph.

Pitch 36

Housman, Patch, and Zander all expect for Jack to call fastball.  Jack knows that is the obvious pitch here so he calls for another changeup.  It is the perfect call and gives the kid a little rest for the arm.  Joe nods knowing that Jack is right.

Vick’s third swing and miss is almost identical to the first.  The margin of light between bat and ball is narrower than Jack would like.  A strike, however, is still a strike.

“Steeerike  three; Batter’s out” calls Patch.

The stadium erupts again in rapturous approval.

On his way to the dugout Jack meets with Tim and takes the proffered marker.  He writes the number “12” very small next to the word “Rawlings” on the ball.  He then gets the record ball back from Tim.  He writes “11” in the same place on this one.  He puts both balls in the bag that Tim acquired.  He gestures to Brooks Angelino, the club’s equipment manager.  Brooks moves over to him with his usual broad grin.
Jack hands him the bag and explains, “We are going to save the balls for Joe.  Little Tim will bring them to you.  Just keep them in the bag and keep the bag close.  Don’t call any attention to it.”

Brooks, whose summer weathered face is more like an old leather mitt nods his understanding and grins broader, “You always think more like a chess player than a baseball bum.  It must be that college education.”

Ricky Boggs leads off the bottom of the fourth with a line drive single to right.  Kent sacrifices deep to left to advance Boggs to second.  McCracken drives a hard liner that is stabbed and caught by the first baseman.  Stanley Jones fouls off seven times before he gets under one that has great height but no distance.  The second baseman reals it in for the third out leaving Boggs stranded.  At the end of the fourth inning the score stands at 0-0.


Dormant Faith – Closing Thoughts

Greetings Dear Reader,

I could simply post here a single thought: There are no secular issues.  Of course I am never that short spoken and a little exposition here is warranted.  From my waking thoughts to my last ones each day before sleep claims me I am accountable for all that I think and do.

There is no area where my following Christ does not matter.  This is not something that is designed to engender guilt.  It is a hope and reassurance that if I seek God with all my heart I will find him.  If I try to compartmentalize any area of my being away from God it will erode my faith. 

Nothing about following Christ is limited.  Every thought matters.  Every idle word spoken must be his.  Every action must be an act of faith that I am doing all that I can to reflect Christ.  There is no time off or vacation.  We are always on.  I cannot react in anger.  I must respond in love.  I cannot push back.  I must listen and understand.  I must give my very best to the following and allow the rest to work itself out.

It does not matter how I feel.  It does not matter what I want for myself.  If I keep my faith vibrant and follow in that faith everything else will unfold as it should.  The danger exists when I begin to cut out areas that I think I can sequester from Christ.  Eventually I will cut out enough of them that I will mothball my faith and harm those I love.  I have done it before and am determined not to do it again.  How about you Dear Reader?  

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

03 October 2013

Dormant Faith – Because of the Cost

Greetings Dear Reader,

If I live my faith it will cost me something.  This is just true.  I will have to give up things that are selfish and vain.  I may have to forgo things that I want.  I will have to care about the needs of others over my own.  I will have to control my anger.  I will have to forgive even when I do not wish to forgive.

At times it will seem easier to mothball my faith because of the cost.  I know people who have.  It will be easier to cloak the choice in logic and reason.  Perhaps it will be easier to deny the need for faith at all.  I cannot do this. 

I have moved through times when I had no faith.  I have been down the path where I just ignored the requirements of my beliefs.  I have failed often to live the faith I love.  I have even violated the faith I have because the cost was just too high at the time.  This is such a desolate choice. 

Untested faith is not of much value.  When my faith is tested it is an opportunity for me to be who I wish to be.  It is a chance to follow Christ more closely.  Instead of this there are times when I have done as I wanted because I felt the cost of keeping the faith was too high.  I have learned that making my faith dormant in any area for any reason leads to pain for me and for others.  The cost is only too high if I do not live my faith; too high for me and for others.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

02 October 2013

Dormant Faith – Sequestered Areas

Greetings Dear Reader,

It seems that many things in our culture force us to compartmentalize our lives.  I have great difficulty with this in various ways.  In much of society we are allowed to be ourselves only to a certain degree.  This compartmentalization is not really healthy.

Who we are is what the world needs.  Instead the world decides that the who is not acceptable in some ways and so must behave differently.  We call it political correctness or socially acceptable behavior.   We make up rules that set a level of comfort that we deem acceptable.

It is not that we do not need some boundaries in society.  It is that we use them to make ourselves better than others.  I know I do the same thing with God.  I compartmentalize a part of my life that I do not wish to subject to Christ.  This is an act of faithlessness or direct disobedience on my part.  I think that I can sequester a part of me from conforming to Christ.

The greatest failures of my life are a direct result or me thinking I can sequester my faith from an area or my life.  There is nothing that is not impacted by my faith.  If I do not do something because I am aligning it with my faith, it is sin.  There is no way to sequester things from God.  I try and fail.  Whenever I try to keep things out of the real of faith I make a part of my faith dormant.

This always hurts me and often hurts others.  In Christ is where I must live and move in order to have any measure of success that matters.  For me, anything else is an attempt to hide something that is already known.  It is only delaying that which must occur to move forward.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

01 October 2013

Dormant Faith – First Thoughts

Greetings Dear Reader,

One of the things that I ponder often is the life of those who claim to believe the things I believe but do nothing to live it out.  This is not a judgment nor is it going to be an attack on anyone.   James, the brother of Jesus tells us that if our faith is without action then it is dead. 

Since faith is to inform everything I do I need to consider the consequences of packing away my faith in any area of my life.  Why would I do this?  What is it that causes people to declare an area free from their faith?  Even if one does this does it work? 

I am also aware that those who seem to have put away their faith entirely.  Someone recently said to me that they still believe but it is too difficult to live out what he believes.  When people take this position it translates to me that there are issues which they do not wish to address.  I know that is what I am doing when I do this.

I am going to spend some time pondering this issue and walk through a few of the areas I know that I struggle with.  Hopefully I will find a way to minimize the areas in which I try to mothball my faith.  Travel with me if you wish.  As always, Dear Reader I value your thoughts and questions.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."