22 July 2018

That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now ~ Closing Thoughts


Greetings Dear Reader,

Through the week I have been writing this great sorrow has visited me.  Two dear friends have passed away.  I have had to watch young parents burry their young child.  Another precipitating sorrow walks with me daily about which I am not free to speak. 

It is in these moments that I realize that the daily challenges seem so difficult because my energy goes to processing the grief and loss.  We hear about floods and do not really comprehend them until they impact us.  We do not feel the loss of waters washing away all there is until it is OUR all there is. 

The slow flood of things over the last year have tried to wash me away.  I thought I was strong.  I am not.  I have faith.  I want to say unequivocally that it is Christ and the kindness of others that is sustaining me.  Only through faith and following am I not destroyed.  My emotions want me to despair and doubt.  I refuse. 

We must train our minds to be stronger than our feelings or we will lose ourselves every time.  I was in danger of losing myself.  The sorrow and grief remind me where to look.  The pain and loss drive me to pursue.  The joy in the darkest parts of the journey is found in following the Light.  “That's all I want to say right now, I don't want to say too much…Except Sweet Jesus, roll all over me.”

Sweet River Roll – Waterdeep

Homebound Henry's got a tumor in his head
He wakes up every morning after dreaming he was dead
He used to think that life was boring, but now that's not the case
He turns to his wife in the evening, he says "Honey I'm afraid I'm gonna lose this race."

Sweet River, roll all over me
Sweet River, roll all over me 

Soaking wet Juliet- she lives in a well full of tears
Her husband left her for some bimbo after twenty-two years
Now she's got to start all over, but she's just so terrified
She thinks it woulda been so much easier if he woulda just died 

Sweet River, roll all over me
Sweet River, roll all over me 

And I'm lookin out my car window sittin' in the pouring rain
Although your house is fifteen miles away, I can still feel your pain
I've thought and prayed and worked it through about a hundred times or more
How your soul just cries to everyone to help you get up off the floor 

Right now it's morning, you're probably totally unaware
Of the flood of kisses you hold back by the way that you despair
It ain't me I'm talking about here, or anybody else you can touch
That's all I want to say right now, I don't want to say too much…

Except Sweet Jesus, roll all over me
Sweet Jesus, roll all over me...
You gotta come down and just set me free

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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21 July 2018

That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now ~ You Say


Greetings Dear Reader,

We get so caught up in our own thoughts and feelings that we do not hear it when others say good things to us.  We treat the good like we are coated with oil and the bad like we are made of glue.  We imagine things far more harmful than what was actually said.

When we build lies, even on the truth we do so much damage to ourselves.  We can create a maelstrom of negative thought that destroys us.  The trap of negativity in our minds becomes quicksand.  We think we are the authority on us when that is just not true.

I know that I do not see my good or bad qualities as clearly as I should.  There are those who see me as wonderful and those who see me as horrid.  I must be careful not to believe my own press and not to fail to see that which is true about me.  The vital truth about me is contained in the Father’s view of me. 

You too Dear Reader need to see the love and great regard that the Father has for you.  You do not grasp the depth to which you are cherished.  That is all I am going to say right now, except perhaps, you should listen to this song… 

You Say - Lauren Daigle

I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I'm not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low?
Remind me once again just who I am because I need to know

You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And You say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don't belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe, oh I believe
What You say of me
I believe

The only thing that matters now is everything You think of me
In You I find my worth, in You I find my identity, o-ooh

You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And You say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don't belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe, oh I believe
What You say of me
Oh, I believe

Taking all I have and now I'm laying it at Your feet
You have every failure God, You have every victory, o-ooh

You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don't belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe, oh I believe
What You say of me
I believe

Oh I believe, yes I believe
What You say of me
I believe

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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20 July 2018

That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now ~ Unaware


Greetings Dear Reader,

“Right now it's morning, you're probably totally unaware
Of the flood of kisses you hold back by the way that you despair
It ain't me I'm talking about here, or anybody else you can touch
That's all I want to say right now, I don't want to say too much…”

Rivers roll whether we wish it or not.  They roll even if we do not know they exist.  They carry their water and flotsam along the course they flow.  Rivers roll because it is their nature to do so.

We can use them for great purposes.  They allow for commerce and leisure travel.  They feed dams for hydroelectric energy.  When we dam a river for its energy we create a potential flood should the dam fail.  We have all see the effects of floods.  They devastate. 

Our denial of the Father’s love for us shows in so many of our poorer habits.  We choose things that keep us from knowing the love of God.  We think that through unbelief and self-gratification we can hold back the flood that is coming.  Love crushes those barriers like a rolling storm-engorged river.

I can only do so much.  What I can do is refrain from creating barriers and do my part in showing that love to others.  That, however, is all I am going to say right now…

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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19 July 2018

That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now ~ I Thought and Prayed and Worked it Through


Greetings Dear Reader,

“And I'm lookin out my car window sittin' in the pouring rain
Although your house is fifteen miles away, I can still feel your pain
I've thought and prayed and worked it through about a hundred times or more
How your soul just cries to everyone to help you get up off the floor”

I hear you Dear Reader.  I do not often have the answer in a practical applicable form but I do hear you.  Your pain is real and I understand it.  Even if you think I do not understand it, I do not have to in order to love you and care about your pain.

We all end up on the floor at some time.  We all need help to get up and try again.  Too often we fail to help each other rise.  We look down, condemn, and step over or on those who need a hand. 

We also alienate those who want to genuinely help.  We let our pride or our romance with our pain keep us from accepting help when we need it.  We sometimes let our hurt become our identity.  We claim we are not victims whilst playing the role in every moment. 

My failure is often to tell everyone I am OK when I am not.  I do draw a line between making my troubles my banner and denying them.  I must be more forthcoming when I speak to my friends.  I must be more open here as well. 

We all need help to get up off the floor.  We should do better at doing that for each other.  That’s all I’m gonna say right now.  I don’t wanna say too much.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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18 July 2018

That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now ~ Soaking Wet Juliet


Greetings Dear Reader,

“Soaking wet Juliet- she lives in a well full of tears
Her husband left her for some bimbo after twenty-two years
Now she's got to start all over, but she's just so terrified
She thinks it woulda been so much easier if he woulda just died” 

Relationships are so difficult in our time.  Conflicts of values, priorities, and lifestyles limit our ability or willingness to connect.  Once in relationships there are easier escape clauses and diversions.  The complexity of the world and our roles in it make it too easy to disregard commitment, responsibilities, and vows. 

We actually use our own desires and wants as justification for violation of the trust of others.  Please read clearly that I said “WE”.   I am guilty of this as well.   We abandon lives that are our responsibility in the name of finding ourselves.  We pursue our dreams leaving a wake of destruction and pain.  It always comes back to us. 

The other side of that is our failure to forgive those who wrong us.  We carry the pain as our new best friend.  We turn bitterness into our way of life.  We make the betrayal our banner and gather like minds under it.  This too leaves a wake of pain in its path and returns nothing good to us.

We justify our failures.  Sometimes we abandon all of our values just to get what we want.  In truth, even if things turn out well for us we have bought that success on the lives of others.  That is never acceptable, but that is all I am going to say right now.  I don’t want to say too much…except, sweet river, roll.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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17 July 2018

Second Thoughts ~ Good Morning Young Lady


Greetings Dear Reader,

Recently my eldest Son teased me about calling people young man and young lady.  I find it a graceful way to address people.  I like the idea of ageing into a quirky Southern gentleman and this fits.

In my Summer-school teaching role I encounter 4k through 4th graders.  I stand in the hall as they file in to greet them each day.  Yesterday I wished a fond “good morning young lady” to a four-year-old.  Without missing a beat she replied, “Good Morning Old-Man.”

Her mum was instantly mortified.  I reassured her that I was not offended in the least.  Mum went on to tell me that her daughter seemed to say whatever was on her mind without the least bit of hesitation.  I find this both delightful and challenging.  We must teach children to keep the honesty and adopt tact.  This is a tightrope that few adults manage well.

Today the little girl came up to me and said that she was sorry she called me an old man.  I assured her that I was not upset a bit and asked if I could still call her young lady.  She said that I could as long as I remembered her name too.  I said her name and promised to remember it always.

She smiled very broadly and thought for a moment.  Then she asked, “Will you remember it in ten years?”  I assured her that I would.

She asked, “Will you remember it in twenty years?”  Again, I reassured her that I would.

Dubious and doubtful she asked, “Will you remember my name in fifty years?”  I promised that I would.  With a large pout she said, “No you won’t because you’ll be dead.”  She stormed off.

We need to be honest but we also should choose what we say more carefully.  This young lady was sure I wound not be around in fifty years.  I hope to be so that I can see Halley’s Comet again.  I wonder if she knows something I do not.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now ~ Homebound Henry



Greetings Dear Reader,

“Homebound Henry's got a tumor in his head
He wakes up every morning after dreaming he was dead
He used to think that life was boring, but now that's not the case
He turns to his wife in the evening, he says ‘Honey I'm afraid I'm gonna lose this race.’"

This first verse of the song I chose as my springboard into this always haunts me a little.  I know people who are facing terminal or chronic disease and pain.  I also know the long-term impact of nightmares on our ability to cope. Pain and trauma impede our hope and too often others just do not understand.

I know that even talking about the maladies that I face is uncomfortable for me.  I do not wish to complain or burden others with carrying my pack.  I also know that when I do not address my needs I slip into unhealthy ways of dealing with them. 

We need to be more compassionate to the ongoing pain of others.  There is a balance between enabling their weakness related to it and not showing the needed kindness.  We must not let pain be our banner but we must also care about the pain of others.  I have friends who suffer daily from emotional, mental, or physical pain.  Some of those with physical maladies have a clock on their lives. 

Since we are all on the same journey and is not a race, it does not harm us to be more compassionate and caring.  We lose nothing when we invest kindness in the hurt of others.  I would wager that instead we gain.  My obligation is not to get “my needs” met.  It is to care for others and trust that my needs will get met. 

Again, I find that following Christ is not about me.  It is about being sure that I am compassionate and loving others at any cost.  When I focus on my own pain and needs I turn inward.  That is not how we are designed, but that is all I am going to say right now. I do not want to say too much.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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16 July 2018

That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now ~ Self Talk


Greetings Dear Reader,

We hear and see things often about our inner dialogue.  Not a day goes by where social media does not include a meme about who we are and how we should think of ourselves.  The subject is vital but I wonder if we have the discipline to apply it.

When I think of self talk, I think that the negative messages over which we ruminate are the dangerous things.  All wrong begins as a thought.  We ponder something and then it becomes an action.  Our negative feelings about everything start as a tendril of thought that we allow to grow into weeds that clog our minds.

Thomas Traherne said, “To think well is to serve God in the interior court.”  We are told in the epistles to bring into captivity every thought.  It is how we think that determines what we do.  It is our minds that lead us to good or ill.

We choose.  We take in data and accept or reject it.  We tend to believe lies over the truth.  We embrace negative over positive.  I must capture every thought.  I must kill the bad ones and propagate the good ones.  I must reject the lies and have faith in the truth.  I must only say what is good and true.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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15 July 2018

That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now ~ Too Many Words


Greetings Dear Reader,

I have been downsizing my library of late.  My goal is to reduce it by half.  As I work through what to lose and keep something occurred to me that had not.  I sit here spinning out my thoughts and tales so easily because I have a computer.  So many of the books I have were written before there were computers.  Many of those were created before the typewriter.

Even my earliest writings were done on a typewriter.  When I consider the works of writers like Charles Dickens I see the many hours of penning tales, restarts, and then typesetting to create the newspaper in which the story was forged or the book to be published. 

Anyone can write what he or she wishes and throw it out on the blogosphere for others to read or ignore.  It is too easy to say too much.  It takes no discipline to rant about anything for pages.  I often wish to do this.  The discipline is to say what needs saying and do so lovingly, politely. 

I do not need to trample on anyone to express my thoughts and questions.  I would prefer to have the real-life conversations in person so that I can listen as well as communicate.  It is easy to use too many words.

As I work to craft my novels I fill in detail and descriptions to extend the experience for you Dear Reader.  Here I aim to be brief out of respect for your precious time.  I would be honored to hear a word or two from you.  I will keep it brief so that I make space to listen.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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14 July 2018

“That’s All I Gonna Say Right Now” ~ Opening Thoughts


Greetings Dear Reader,

There comes a time when we must all choose.  What we choose always matters and there are ripples, reverberations, and repercussions.  Some things can be healed or mended.  Words can never be recalled.

We go through the process.  We feel, think, and speak.  We judge and condemn.  We become angry, make assumptions, and harbor opinions that damage those we love and our own spirits.  As we sink deeper into the things that harm us we speak lies and do harm.  I still carry the echoes of words said to me when what I needed what an ear and some kindness.

We know that we need help and we summon the courage to speak.  We seek out someone and take the risk.  Then, all that person does is talk, advise, and fail.  They do not see that we need someone to just listen.  We need them to listen with heart and spirit and be with us.

Recent events have required that I confront that heart.  I am a very good listener when I remember to listen.  Sometimes, however, I get mired in my own thoughts and feelings and forget that I am supposed to be that good listener.  A series of serious events have reminded me that I need to constantly sharpen this blade.  If I do not I become dull of hearing and fail to be of good use to others.

I intend to spend some time delving into this.  I intend to listen to the things others say and form a better strategy for helping.  This week has included death, tragedy, and pain that impact me deeply.  As I see how things unfold I realize just how little I can do other than be there. 

Please walk with me Dear Reader.  Tell me what you want me to listen for.  I know that I must become more aware of the flood of love that awaits us all in a world that works so hard to hold it back.  That is all I am going to say right now.  I don't want to say too much.  Sweet river, roll.    

Sweet River Roll – Waterdeep

Homebound Henry's got a tumor in his head
He wakes up every morning after dreaming he was dead
He used to think that life was boring, but now that's not the case
He turns to his wife in the evening, he says "Honey I'm afraid I'm gonna lose this race."

Sweet River, roll all over me
Sweet River, roll all over me 

Soaking wet Juliet- she lives in a well full of tears
Her husband left her for some bimbo after twenty-two years
Now she's got to start all over, but she's just so terrified
She thinks it woulda been so much easier if he woulda just died 

Sweet River, roll all over me
Sweet River, roll all over me 

And I'm lookin out my car window sittin' in the pouring rain
Although your house is fifteen miles away, I can still feel your pain
I've thought and prayed and worked it through about a hundred times or more
How your soul just cries to everyone to help you get up off the floor 

Right now it's morning, you're probably totally unaware
Of the flood of kisses you hold back by the way that you despair
It ain't me I'm talking about here, or anybody else you can touch
That's all I want to say right now, I don't want to say too much…

Except Sweet Jesus, roll all over me
Sweet Jesus, roll all over me...
You gotta come down and just set me free

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Contacts for Aramis Thorn:
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