Common Courtesy is not so Common

Greetings Dear Readers,

Recently I was speaking with a friend who has more time on the planet that me and she was recalling how different thing were when she was young. I have to agree. It used to be that when you bumped, nudged, or collided with someone, you said, “Excuse me please.” Now the best we get is “sorry” mumbled under the breath and sometimes and expletive for being in another’s way.

It used to be that you were polite to clerks and shopkeepers. It used to be that clerks and shopkeepers were polite to you. It is wearing to me to order food from a sullen teenager who will not look me in the eye or is texting on their phone whilst I am trying to explain that my daughter is allergic to oranges.

I remember that one used to never have to listen to a string of expletives in order to sit and have a meal at a restaurant. It used to be that people were polite in society and civil with each other. Common courtesy was actually common. The thing is we used to be kind and gentle with strangers. Now they are avoided and even scorned.

My Son Maxim used to work as an assistant manager at a local convenience store. He is polite and does his best to make short moments with strangers leave them with a feeling of kindness. A coworker who chanced upon him told me how he behaved. It seems that she was surprised by the genuineness of his comment to her as she paid for her gas. After taking her money and giving her a receipt he simply said, “Take care” as a parting comment. What caught her attention was that she was sure he meant it. He knew they had not met and in that moment he imparted a viable concern for her wellbeing.

How much difference can we make if we are just polite? How much better can we feel if we go a little farther in being kind to each other? I will leave you with this. A guy I interact with regularly stopped me the other day as I paid for my bill at his business. Yes I am being vague on purpose. He told me that he wanted to thank me for being nice to him. I did not remember what I had done so he explained.

Apparently he hates his job and usually goes home and just tunes out. On the day we last interacted, I was his last customer. He said that I was kind and listened to him “bitch about how bad he had it,” when we are in a world where any job is a job. Since he went home in a better mood, he was attentive when his child came to him with a concern. In short he said that my politeness made him a better dad and he did not miss a moment that was very important to his relationship with his child. I cannot take credit for this, but in his mind my tiny effort made a big difference. I assert that anyone can be nice.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn