Hiding Behind Freedom

Greetings Dear Reader,

One of the things that is a constant source of ponderous consternation for me is the idea that God gives us freedom in Christ.  I do not wish to do ANYTHING wrong but because I have free will I can choose to do wrong.  There are days when I wish that I had no choice.  There are day I wish God would usurp my will and create in me an inability to do wrong.

Since the inability to sin is not going to be removed whilst I am alive I have to determine how to properly use my freedom.  I am to live as a free person.  What frightens me is when I use that freedom to work my own will over the will of Christ.  I cannot hide behind my freedom to justify doing something I should not.  It is wrong to allow injustice.  Christ followers are to be the lead in the fight against it.  It is wrong to allow the innocent to suffer.  We are to fight against this in every way.  It is also wrong to use my freedom as an excuse to ignore my responsibilities to Christ.   

In the stormy political climate that we find ourselves in I see so many on both sides abdicating the responsibility to obey God in favor of the agenda of a political faction.  If I truly follow Christ I must not abdicate any of my responsibilities to God.  The poor, the oppressed, the innocent, and the hungry are all my responsibility.  I must serve their needs. 

I must do so though without using my freedom to reject morality, righteousness, and holiness.  Every dream of justice and generosity is possible but only as they are realized in the shadow of the cross.  We cannot reject Christ’s teaching in any way and believe we are doing good.  I must follow and be free.  I must use my freedom in Christ to address the social issues of my world.  I must do so while doing what is right in everything.  I do not get to pick and choose what I am free to do.  Freedom is only found in obidende.

God wants you to silence the ignorance of foolish people by doing what is right.  Live as free people, but don't hide behind your freedom when you do evil. Instead, use your freedom to serve God. – Peter the Apostle – 1 Peter 2:15-16

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

Death of a Snail

Greetings Dear Reader,

Photo by Tash Daniel

The other day my friend Tash posted a picture of three snails. They were moving across some stone and the picture was lovely.  She named the snails Bod, Dob, and Rob.  Dob got accidentally stepped on.

So what is the loss of a single snail on a stone in Australia?  I guess it depends on your view of the universe.  Some people will see it as insignificant.  Some will see it as part of the great cycle of life and death.  Some will embrace the fact that I write about it as a chaos reaction.  To me it is very significant.

You see Dob had a purpose.  I do not know what it was or is.  I do not know how it will unfold in the grand design (yes I believe there is a grand design).  I do know that Dob mattered.  No life is insignificant; even that of an Australian snail.  Jesus told us that not even a sparrow falls from the sky without it being noticed by God.  Either God knows of he does not.  I believe he knows. 

I do not believe the death of a snail will change the weather but I know that if I remember that it matters I will not forget the important things that matter.  Dunn pointed out that every person matters; that “every man’s death diminishes me.”  All life matters.  It is given by God and his alone to take.  There things to be gained in all that exists in the natural world.  How can I love God properly if I do not revel in his creation?

If nothing more, Dob the snail reminded me that all life is precious.  That may have been his purpose.    

The Answer

A Rose, in tatters on the garden path,

Cried out to God and murmured 'gainst His Wrath,

Because a sudden wind at twilight's hush

Had snapped her stem alone of all the bush.

And God, Who hears both sun-dried dust and sun,

Had pity, whispering to that luckless one,

"Sister, in that thou sayest We did not well --

What voices heardst thou when thy petals fell?"

And the Rose answered, "In that evil hour

A voice said, `Father, wherefore falls the flower?

For lo, the very gossamers are still.'

And a voice answered, `Son, by Allah's will!'"

Then softly as a rain-mist on the sward,

Came to the Rose the Answer of the Lord:

"Sister, before We smote the Dark in twain,

Ere yet the stars saw one another plain,

Time, Tide, and Space, We bound unto the task

That thou shouldst fall, and such an one should ask."

Whereat the withered flower, all content,

Died as they die whose days are innocent;

While he who questioned why the flower fell

Caught hold of God and saved his soul from Hell – Rudyard Kipling

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

Salt in my Coffee

Greetings Dear Reader,

I love coffee.  I roast my own on my kitchen porch.  I savor it and never drink more than two cups in the morning.  I do not drink coffee after ten in the morning.  One of my friends once told me that I make coffee that tastes like coffee smells.  To me that is a very good thing.

Lately I have noticed that even the mildest cup of coffee gives me a churlish stomach.  I realize that this is just one of the indicators that I am growing older and that the machine that houses my spirit is beginning to wear down.  This is to be expected and tolerated but I am learning ways to slow the decline.

So as I write this my Saturday morning pot of coffee is brewing.  I can already smell the sweet aroma as it drifts on the drafts of my old farm house.  It is full of the promise of rich flavor and warm enjoyment.  It is medium roast, the last of my stores from what I was roasting the day my Grandson was born.  I can just barely hear the bubble and hiss of the coffee maker as it renders the rich brown liquid born of water and beans.  I would drink the coffee even if I knew that tummy tumults would be the result.

As the coffee began to wage its war on my digestion I remembered something I had learned a long time ago.  A few weeks ago as I prepared the filter for my freshly ground beans I put a pinch of salt in the bottom of the filter.  This tiny bit of salt gave me back my enjoyment of the coffee without the resultant digestive roller derby. 

I love good coffee and as in years past I do not over indulge (When in my twenties I drank a liter or more a day).  I can now enjoy it and not pay a price in pain.  It took only a minor adjustment that costs me nothing in flavor, texture, or aroma.  Since I wrote that last sentence I have gotten up a poured a cup of coffee.  It steams away just to the left of my keyboard. 

Like my coffee I had to make others adjustments in my life to continue to enjoy it as it changed around me.  I have had to learn to be kinder and gentler.  I am learning to be more patient with others.  My eldest Son loved me enough to check if I was “OK” yesterday as we spent some time together.  He has seen the tension in me and wanted to be sure that I was dealing with things.  He may not realize how healing his loving inquiry was for me.  He will now.  My Daughter makes me take my vitamins and cares enough to make sure I get enough rest.  My younger Son asked for some time with just him and I this weekend.  I know that I get these things because my children love me. 

I also know that making adjustments in who I am and how I approach life is making it more enjoyable for me and for those around me.  Any time I am more patient, kind, understanding, and loving I can neutralize a bit of the acid in life.  This is how following Christ is supposed to work.  I am supposed to make the flavor, texture, and aroma of following Christ stand out without injecting any bitterness or pain to the process.  It is worth every moment and every effort of the changing to do that for those I love.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

Moon, Moonnana, and Sevna

Greetings Dear Reader,

In case you have not noticed I have a Grandson.  I love him dearly and he smiles at me a lot.  At fifteen months he is already very verbal.  He loves stars and the moon.  He loves bananas and the number seven.  He loves books and Blue’s Clues.  He brings out the sweetness in all of us.

He will say the word moon over and over when presented with pictures of the moon.  I pulled up a Google search of the work moon and clicked images.  He pointed at each picture and excitedly uttered “moon.”  I then did this with the word “banana” and he pointed at each one and said “Moonnana”.  Now I am not sure if he thinks a banana looks like a crescent moon but I know he can devour an entire banana in 2.736 seconds.  He will then ask for another Moonnana whilst point to the fruit basket.

I pulled up the word seven and he repeated over and over “Sevna” even pointing at it on items I did not realize carried the number.  He likes circles and mandarin oranges.  He is a beautiful and intelligent boy.  I love him so much that it becomes painful to leave him when I must.

Moonnana

I dell on all of this because I am in awe of the beauty being built into what was a blank slate just fifteen months ago.  I see the wisdom and love of God in this small boy.  He knows he is loved.  I already see his likes and dislikes emerging.  I see the uniqueness of his own being as it is different from all others in the world.  I have the chance to be good to him and never violate his trust.  I have the opportunity to be honest and real with him, to show him kindness, and to be a better example than I have been to others.

I see the outstanding intelligence in him and his capacity to sense the needs of others.  I see him being a wonderful person and I see how much his parents love him.  When I see my Grandson the line from the Five for Fighting song dances through my head.  “If God made you he’s in love with me.”

Photo by Emily Sharp

Later today I will see my Grandson.  We will talk of Moons, Moonnana, and Sevna.  He will show me what new things he has learned this week.  He is almost ready to walk.  I will sit and enjoy him quietly thanking God for showing more of himself to me in this beautiful young boy.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

Barren Busyness

Greetings Dear Reader,

Some days at work begin in the parking lot.  A student or colleague will have a question that needs asking before I even get in the building.  I try to train my students that this is a poor practice.  I will politely ask the assailant to let me land and then we can talk.  Very seldom does the issue turn out to be as urgent as he or she thinks it is.

At times I arrive and begin to handle things one after another.  I then look up and lunch time is past or it may even be nearly time to leave for home.  When I leave for home the last thing I do is make a list of things to do tomorrow.  There are many days where that list laughs at me midway through the day.

Most of the time I get to see the rewards of my work.  I see men and women risking much to gain a career over a job.  I get to watch the metamorphic emergence into trained and capable professionals.  At times though I let the busy nature of what I do get in front of the reason I do it.  When scheduling, documenting, and logging become the focus instead a part of the process it is very frustrating.

The busyness of the process is very barren.  If I forget that the tedious bits of the job are part of the process of changing lives then the job is very unpleasant.  When I remember though that a father of four is in a good job helping others do their jobs instead of in prison the endless meetings and paper work are worth it. 

It seems that all of life can be this way.  If I forget the purpose behind what I do then the tedium of mundane tasks become a vast wasteland of a perfunctory nature.  If, however, I remember that one more meeting or another phone call will may be the one that gets a student a job or keep him in school then it is worth it.  If I remember that one more kindness might heal a spirit or another moment of patience may undo someone’s anger then that too is worth it.  This is the part of the journey that makes the busyness less barren.  As in so many cases it is the focus that builds purpose.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

Not a Good Luck Charm

Greetings Dear Reader,

Last week a student came to me about an exam he had to take.  He was obviously nervous and approached me with an air of uncertainty.  He expressed his fear of the exam and we spent some time going over the material he needed to know.  He seemed more confident when we finished.  I went through the key points one more time and then had to get to a meeting.  As I walked out the door he thanked me then said, “It’s not a worry anyway, I will be wearing my cross.”

I spent the entire meeting thinking about this instead of focusing on the meeting.  I am unsure how to approach how I feel about the way in which such a significant symbol of my faith has become relegated to the categories of jewelry or good luck charm.  I do not know why God chose the cross for his place to buy our redemption.  There are heaps of theories and theological postulations about it but none of them ring true for me. 

One of my Grandfather’s favorite songs “The Old Rugged Cross” refers to the cross as “an emblem of suffering and shame.”  There is nothing gold or pretty about the cross.  It was the condemnation place for thieves and political enemies of Rome.  It was a painful torturous death.  People would gather to mock and abuse the dying.  Most of the crucified died of suffocation over a matter of days. 

The cross has no power of its own.  It is what Christ did there that matters.  It is the death and life of Christ that impacts our lives.  The cross I have on my bandana is not just jewelry or a good luck charm.  It is there to remind me that even in leisure I have an obligation to live up to.  The cross is a place of death. 

The Passion of the Christ

The cross reminds me that I must abandon my “self” and die to the things that would occlude others seeing Christ in me.  I cannot take up the cross as if it were a stylish thing.  It offers shame and reproach to be identified with the cross.  Truly following Christ is the path to death that leads to life. 

The cross is the place where God’s blood was demanded so that he could redeem us to himself.  The cross is a wretched place that God used to build a way out of our state of distance from him.  It is our bridge to redemption.  It is the symbol of all the things that God does to call me to him.  The cross on that hill on that day is the marker, the stake planted in the earth that points to the time when God did all that he could to show his love for us.

The cross is not a good luck charm but God hopes to use it to win our hearts. The cross is not about the the wood or the shape.  It is about the man who hung there.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store." 

Shards of My Face

Greetings Dear Reader,

I had the opportunity recently to look at a mirror that was broken.  A baseball had found it at almost its center.  The resultant pattern of cracking was like a spider web.  As I looked into the mirror my face seemed fragmented and broken.  Small section of my nose and eyes repeated as the cracked parts at the center were at slightly different angles.  I studied this for a moment and realized that I found it humorous.  The shards of my face looked funny.

As I pondered this I realized that although I was laughing I was thinking that it should bother me.  I do not know how I made the leap to what I thought next but it has stuck.  The path seems to be that I thought about what my feelings would be were my face truly traced with lines and rivulets.  Were it not painful how would I feel about it?  My mind quickly then threw out the question of pride.  How would my thoughts change about the image I carry of my looks?

From there my mind raced to the idea of brokenness.  Do I really feel broken about who I am in light of Christ and his example?  Does my sin give me pause and drive me to be a better man?  Although I know that sadness is a component of recognizing my sin it is not the hinge-pin of brokenness before God.  I must allow my pride and selfish nature to be shattered.  I must not give thought for myself in this.  I must allow brokenness to pervade my spirit.  What this means is that brokenness is not equal to sadness.  God wishes us to be filled with joy and yet be broken before him. 

Brokenness is of the will over the heart.  My will must be broken and my spirit then and rejoice in the freedom to follow Christ more closely.  In short it is another method for getting out of my own way.

Father break me

Take me through the fire

Father hold me mold me

Just as you desire

I am just a cup to overflow your will

I know I must be empty to be filled – Terry Talbot

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Rolling in the Deep

Greetings Dear Reader,

Last night the singer Adele did quite well at the annual Grammy Awards.  She won six awards including song and record of the year.  In one of her acceptance speeches she referenced the inspiration for her work to what she calls a “rubbish relationship.”  Her amazing song “Rolling in the Deep” is powerful and additive.  The video his haunting and the images leave one to wonder at the specific meaning.  In this song is a repeating line:

The Scars of your love remind me of us. 

They keep me thinking that we almost had it all. 

The scars of your love they leave me breathless. 

I can’t help thinking that we almost had it all. - Adele

I can feel the pain in her music and I hope she fully recovers from it.  I know that I have left scars from others loving me.  I try to interact with those people in ways that promote peace and healing.  I know that I have scars from loving others.  I do not think I will ever truly heal from the most recent deepest wounds.  The scar tissue still feels red and inflamed even though time has relegated that love to the past.

There are other scars for which I share responsibility.  Mine will fade and eventually be permanently relegated to the past.  The ones to which I allude never will be gone.  To love others is to feel joy and revel in the beauty a human.  It is also to take on risk, damage, and scars.  Christ has done all of this for all of us.  He took on all the risk to face incarnation and death for us.  He took the abuse and beating and crucifixion for us; for me.  He carries the eternal scars for that death for me.

Christ’s love for us has left him scarred.  He has suffered everything so that we could follow him.  We, however, take him or leave him as we please.  We betray his love by indulging our will and vices in any way we choose.  What this makes obvious is that he suffered and died; he took on the scars knowing that I and others would continue to harm him.  We would commit sin for which he carried the weight beforehand. 

He knew we would betray him.  He knew we would be unfaithful.  How can I indulge my own selfishness in the light of such love?  It is unconscionable.  I am not my own.  I was bought with a price: God’s blood.  Every time I ignore this to work my own will I take on more responsibility for the scars of his love.  There is no excuse for this.  If I do not give all that I am to loving God with all that I can then I am being unfaithful to the love that is freely given me every day.  If I abandon following Christ in any way it is the scars not the love that identify me. 

Another song comes to mind:  Known by the Scars

The marks of love God chose never to erase

The wounds of loves eternal mark

When the Kingdome comes

With its perfected sons

He’ll be known by the scars – Michael Card     

Is this not what is really rolling in the deep?  We can have it all.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

Scarves of Knowing

Greetings Dear Reader,

I realize that Christmas is a month and a bit gone but that is never the case for me.  Right now in the chill of morning in my office I am enjoying a Christmas gift from a beloved friend.  She and her husband sent gifts for me and all my children to my home.  Each of the gifts is handmade and reflects knowledge of and appreciation for the recipient. 

The gifts are handmade scarves.  Mine is a chain of pancakes with pats of butter.  Adam and Colie have shared pancake breakfasts at my home often.  Food was the bridge to friendship with Adam when I first met him.  My Daughter received one that is ice-cream cones.  My eldest Son’s was bacon and eggs and my youngest received a long slice of pizza.

It was joyous to see each of them revel in the gifts and how much it fit with who they are.  Each is a gift of love from a couple whom I love dearly.  Hours of labor obviously went into the crafting of them.  Mine keeps my neck warm as I write and protects me from the draft in my century old drawing room.  Bezel used his as we were walking in 6 degree weather from the restaurant to the bar on my birthday.  He commented several times on how much he was glad to have it.

Each time I wrap up in mine I am reminded of two things.   That I have friends who love me dearly is the first.  Second that God gives us gifts in the same way.  He gives us what we need and it is tailored to who we are.  So much of what I have in my life fits exactly who I am.  Each time I wrap my chilled neck in this scarf I am not only reminded of Adam and Colie’s love for me; I am reminded that God loves me and will send gifts that I need to keep me safe and warm.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."

  

A Celebrated Life

Greetings Dear Reader,

Yesterday was a wonderful day.  I spent it with my Children and Grandson.  It started with breakfast at my favorite diner with my eldest Son and my Grandson.  My Grandson is a hit everywhere he goes and it made the morning just to see the joy he brings to others.  He is becoming so verbal and tries to say people’s names the first time he is told the name.

I spent the afternoon just relaxing with my kids and got to see them all.  As my Sons and I left for a guys’ night out with other friends who have a birthday this week, my Daughter-in-law kissed me on the cheek and told me, “You have a good time.  You deserve it.”  She has no idea what a gift that kindness from her is to me.

I was the eldest at a dinner table of eight men and the conversation was light and enjoyable.  Later I was able to save a new friend from forgetting his Father-in-law’s birthday.  The young man had no idea I knew his Father-in-law and that we share a birthday.

I returned home fourteen hours after I left feeling celebrated and loved by my children.  My Daughter has plans for us today that I am excited about.  I am not famous though I may be some day.  I am not rich though I have more than I need.  What I am is loved by my Children and that is more than I could ever ask for.  They make the journey sweet and lively and I love them more every day.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."