14 June 2009

Names for Animals part 2

Greetings Dear Readers,

My Son Maxim reminded me last night that I promised you all another round of Animal groupings called venery or collective nouns. Shall we dive right into it?

We all know that fish swim in schools. They also congregate in other groupings. One can witness a shoal of shad, a grind of blackfish, and a lap of cod. I have done this last in a fine dining restaurant. Eels swim in a fry, whilst herrings are in a glean. Salmon, oxymoronically come in both a run and a bind. This sounds very unpleasant to me. Tilapias gather in a taint, trout in a hover, goldfish in a glint, and clams, quite comfortably in a bed.

Bats come is a cloud. Buffalo gather in gangs, although I have not heard of many buffalo selling drugs or street fighting. One can have a string of ponies, a rake of colts, or a stud of mares. This last one seems at best odd. Imagine how far away one could smell a surfeit of skunks. One could see the dreadfulness of an ambush of tigers, a destruction of wildcats, or a glaring of cats (they stare at me all the time). We have mentioned that bears come in a sleuth but one reader pointed out that Polar Bears come in an aurora and sun bears in a sloth.

One may see hopping along a brace of conies, a husk of jackrabbits, a prong of jack-a-lopes, and I really want to see someone pull this off, a leash of rabbits.

Moving into the skies we may see a siege of bitterns, tribe of sparrows, and a knob of pintails. Eagles congregate in convocation whilst magpies gather in a congregation. This may be why there is so much gossip in churches. One may see a hill of ruffs, a hedge of herons, or a desert of lapwings. Very geographical I think.

The next time you are out and about with a group of friends remember that you should be happy. You do not need to travel in a piteousness of doves, a sorrow of sorrels, or a lamentation of swans. You may wish to go on a lark of well, larks, join a band of jays (they play metal mostly), or join a harmony of nightingales.

Until then I wish you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

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