Negating Needs ~ Companions

Greetings Dear Reader,

I know that I have stated many times how much I abhor living alone.   There are many reasons for this and most of them are deeply personal.  It is not something I will redress here.  What I do need to consider is what my genuine needs are as regards companions.

We are designed to be social people.  We do better when we care for each other and share good things with each other.  When I am out and the world my focus is to be that of showing kindness, grace, and love to everyone.  When I am back at my abode, however, there is something about isolation that is difficult for me.

Even though I hate this, it does not mean that there is a genuine need there.  I am not saying that I do not have a genuine need for companionship and family.  I am saying that I must define clearly where need ends and want begins.  Even in the deep feelings of isolation and the torment I feel over it, it is very clear that I define wants his needs.

If I am going to be all that I should be, then I must squelch the wants that are not needs.  This is much easier to say than to put into place.  Perhaps the question I can put up against those feelings is one that I use against filtering other activities.  The question is, “Who does it serve?”

Everything about my life should be focused on lovingly serving Christ and the needs of others.  Beyond that, I’m supposed to count on Christ to meet my needs.  Even if my wants have good and honest motivation, if they are not needs, I must strip them away because it is not me that determines things.

I think that we all across the barrier between want and need when it comes to good things.  Just because I want peace of mind about something does not mean that I need it.  Instead, I must use my faith to realize that I and exercising a want and not trying to meet a need.  I think that many of the things we do to damage close relationships are involved in forgetting where this line is.

I can only become my best self and every moment if I constantly am aware of the difference between wanting to know and needing to have faith.  It really is the essence of following Christ that this difference matters.  If I am to acknowledge Christ in a all my ways, it must go is deep as the very core of my wanting to know that things are OK.  It must reach all the way to my worry, doubts, and fears.

I do need friends and companions.  I do need fellow travelers.  This does not mean that I get to define them the way I want to.  It does not mean that I can place demands on anyone and then say I am doing it out of care for them.  The answer of the question of who it serves becomes me.  That is not following in faith.  So, as frightening as it may be I must strip away everything that is an interpersonal one and not a genuine need.  I must not exercise my wants because then they become stronger and represent themselves as needs.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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Gratitude ~ Companionship

Greetings Dear Reader,

I wrote earlier in this series about friends.  I value friends greatly.  What I value more are true companions.  The distinction for me is very different.  Companions are rare and precious.

Companions are those who get you and stand with you no matter what.  Whether they share your values or not they respect them.  They know what matters to you.  They listen and speak with common understanding.  You give and take counsel together.

Then there are the even deeper ones who fight the good fight with you.  They are the ones who share your vision and values.  They are the ones who walk with you in the journey and you care for each other as fellow travelers. 

True companions are rare and few.  When I find one in my life I cherish it.  I am filled with gratitude for it.  In times of great pain and sorrow these are the ones who support and care for you.  These are the ones who are there when you are on top and on the bottom.

Some days the journey seems long and lonely.  It is my companions who see this and are there to keep me going.  Some days amazing things unfold and it is those same companions who celebrate with me whether they benefit from the unfolding or not. 

I strive to be that for others because it is what we all need.  Lately we here it called our tribe or our peeps.  I feel that we need to keep the deep understanding of this vital sub-set of our friends.  We need to always feel grateful for them.  We need to realize that the journey becomes much more difficult without them.

I am grateful for my companions.  I strive to be one for others who need it.  And as always I am grateful for your companionship Dear Reader.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Things Lost in the Fire – Companions

Greetings Dear Reader,

There is a line from a Kipling poem: “And the gloom of my bachelor days is flecked with the cheery light, of stumps that I burned to Friendship and Pleasure and Work and Fight.”

Over the years there are friends who have been with me through difficult times and tumultuous waters.  There are friends with whom I have walked through dark days.  I love them all.  Not all of them still love me. 

Some of the loss is my fault.  Some of my greater failures have harmed them and those friends have chosen to forsake me rather than allow things between us to heal.  This is not a judgment against them.  I do, however, long for the time when past offenses are left behind in the desire to journey home in companionship and harmony. 

Others have left the faith.  I love them no less but there is something about the common ground of a common path on a shared journey that binds us.  When we walk together in that shared faith we have a foothold to solve all ills.  When faith is forsaken once comforting conversation become contentious or offensive. 

The distance is there even when the space is common.  The heart breaks freshly when I see those who are dear to me but have chosen distance over forgiveness, faith, and fellowship.  Again, that is not a faulting of these friends.  It is my sorrow over the loss of communion and counsel.

I learn from this to love everyone without condition.  I fail at it but strive for it.  I cultivate joy at the encounter of those who are dear to me whenever we meet.  I treat strangers with kindness and welcome.  I keep all doors open so that should any of these friends seek me out they will find welcome.  I long for the time when Christ makes all things right and we can sit together in the light of peace.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)