Second Thoughts – On Eggnog

Greetings Dear Reader,

Sometimes I will end the day with thoughts that are important to get out.  Usually I just write them and put them in my journal folder.  I have chosen that on occasion I will share them with you Dear Reader.

Dear Reader as your read this please picture me with my tongue firmly implanted in my cheek.  Whilst I am disappointed over the turn of events I am aware that there are much more important things to the Christmas season than that which follows. 

I love eggnog.  I revel in the rich and creamy goodness.  It is one of the first food things I seek in my celebration of the Christmas season.  There is good and bad eggnog out there and I am admittedly an eggnog snob.  I keep a Christmas glass in my cupboard year round to remind me to anticipate that first glass each year.  I remember each time one of my children has gifted me with eggnog. 

Since my years have cost me the joys of things with too many carbohydrates I must be careful of my eggnog intake more so that I used to need.  I have a list of eggnog repasts in which I indulge.  I am very picky about that which is a proper flavor substitute.  Some things that claim to be eggnog flavored are merely bad replications of nutmeg and rum with colored yellow cream.

I have found a coffee, a creamer, and drink that serve as a lower sugar substitute for my eggnog cravings.  This year the eggnog world has conspired to frustrate my endeavors.  The drink is unavailable anywhere.  The creamer costs more than real eggnog and they have not produced the sugar free variety.  The coffee company chose not to produce eggnog flavored coffee this year but instead made crème brulee.  Humbug I say.  I assure you that these slights will not go unanswered. 

I have written to the coffee company and produced a brilliantly scathing complaint in the 255 character limit that is worthy of Sheldon Cooper.  I have advised the creamery that I will be purchasing the competitor’s brand until they see fit to charge the same price for eggnog creamer that they charge for other flavors.  After all it is the height of flavor prejudice to exclude eggnog from the available selections or making it so pricey that only the 1% can afford it. 

I will be resolute and keep my Christmas spirit to the last but having to do so without less dangerous forms of eggnog is quite quarrelsome.  I was just informed during my distress that McDonald’s still has eggnog shakes.  I am off to get one.  Merry Christmas Dear Reader.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."