Greetings Dear Reader,
Most of this time has been beautiful. It fills me with joy to watch my Grandsons
enjoy the water. Seeing them interact
with others is amazing. They are kind
and generous to everyone around them.
A bit of dimness in the bright Florida sun has been the constant
reminder that I no longer have a fellow traveler. I am not blaming anyone but I do not know how
to solve the problem. I refuse to
indulge in vices that dull the pain.
There is too much chronic substance abuse in my past to even put a toe
on that path.
Still the things that a traveler needs are not there. I also refuse to use women to satisfy my
needs so I cannot “hook up” for the physical aspects of my loneliness. I have gained a clear understanding of the
things in me that drive others away. I
may have learned it too late to find someone willing to risk walking with me.
It is not that I will not travel alone if need be. It is that I would prefer not to do so. It is that the journey is so much more
difficult when you walk with the knowledge that who you are is patently
unrewarding to those who promised to love you and stay by your side no matter
what.
The sea always reminds me of this. Perhaps that is why I do not return too
often. The last time I was hear my
fellow traveler was already planning to leave me and I did not know it. As the sea rolls in its constant symphony of
waves it reminds me that it too is a love that I cannot hold.
I look up a Jupiter and also spot Venus and Mars. A song pops into my head and the tears
come. Even in this moment where I feel
so surrounded and alone all at once I must travel on. I must follow even if this place in me is
never touched again.
Now that she's back in the atmosphere
With drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey, hey
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that there's a time to change, hey, hey, hey
Since the return from her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and she talks like June, hey, hey,
hey, hey
But tell me, did you sail across the sun?
Did you make it to the Milky Way
To see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated?
Tell me, did you fall from a shooting star?
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me
While you were looking for yourself out there?
Now that she's back from that soul vacation
Tracing her way through the constellation, hey
She checks out Mozart while she does Tae-Bo
Reminds me that there's room to grow, hey
Now that she's back in the atmosphere
I'm afraid that she might think of me as
Plain ol' Jane told a story about a man
Who was too afraid to fly so he never did land
But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet?
Did you finally get the chance
To dance along the light of day
And head back to the Milky Way?
And tell me, did Venus blow your mind?
Was it everything you wanted to find?
And did you miss me
While you were looking for yourself out there?
Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken
Your best friend always sticking up for you
Even when I know you're wrong?
Can you imagine no first dance, freeze-dried romance
Five-hour phone conversation
The best soy latte that you ever had, and me?
But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet?
Did you finally get the chance
To dance along the light of day
And head back toward the Milky Way?
But tell me, did you sail across the sun?
Did you make it to the Milky Way
To see the lights all faded
And that heaven is overrated?
And tell me, did you fall from a shooting star?
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me
While you were looking for yourself?
na na na na na na na na na na na na na
And did you finally get the chance
To dance along the light of day?
na na na na na na na na na na
And did you fall from a shooting star?
Fall from a shooting star?
na na na na na na na na na
And were you lonely looking for yourself out there?
Wishing you joy in the journey,
Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer
who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home
owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure
store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)