The Nature of Reality

Greetings Dear Reader,

Besides being complicated, reality, in my experience, is usually odd. It is not neat, not obvious, not what you expect. – C.S. Lewis

One of the thoughts I am processing as I attempt to climb out of this valley of shadows is that of reality versus my dreams and desires.  In reality I never wanted my first marriage to end.  My actions brought it about and I was too far entrenched in my own selfishness to do the right thing.

In my simple thinking on reality I saw my Sons and I sharing years and years of a positive journey with Christ together.  I dreamt of healthy discussions about Christ and following him.  In reality it is not that way. 

I have lost all understanding of how we commit to things and the later say “I did not mean it” or “I have changed my mind.”  The reality of holding to what we commit to is complex, odd, and often difficult.  I am guilty of this so my loss of understanding is not a claim to innocence.  Rather it is a realization that we cannot hope to violate our commitment to Christ and escape unscathed. 

The complex reality is that individual actions that reject Christ have far reaching consequences that we cannot in our limited view of reality hope to embrace.  Saying simply that we have changed our beliefs on a matter or simplifying them so that we have watered down all that God demands on us is a practice in catastrophic failure.  My failures have obviously impacted my family far more deeply than I hoped they would.

I see those around me that I love distancing themselves from Christ when they have pledged in the past to ever follow him.  This brings me great grief.  Because God does not do things as we expect is never a reason to lessen our fervor for him.  We place simple expectations on God when in reality his design is for more complex than we can even imagine.

In my grief and struggle I cannot place my limited view of things as the measuring rod for how I think things should unfold relative to God and my fealty to him.  If he asks me to follow in total darkness that completely confuses and disorients me, then I am not following blindly.  I am being obedient.  When I do not understand that is when I must commit more of my resources to faith. 

God is not a God of private faith or personal reality.  He is not subject to my reasoning or opinion.  He put it all on the line for me and all he asks in return is that I follow.  No matter how little light I have for that following it is the least I can offer.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store."