09 February 2015

Say What You Need to Say – Nightmares and Dreams

Greetings Dear Reader,

I have terrible nightmares at least once or twice a week.  I used to have them occasionally but over the last seven years they have been a consistent companion in my attempts to rest.  I will not infect your thoughts with the details of them but they almost always involve violence being done to me.

Art by Melissa Benson
At first I would scream and awaken others.  Mercifully I have learned some ways to curb that.  I still awaken a couple of nights a week feeling myself for wounds or looking for damage.  I have to take a moment to remember where I am and that the dream is not real.  Then I take a few moments to pray.

I know I am not alone in this.  I know that others experience much worse night terrors.  Mine are not debilitating.  I am as used to them as one can become to such things.  I would banish them if I could but I think there would be a price.

Sometimes, at least once week I have amazing dreams of beauty and grace.  Some of them are seeing things I wish for fulfilled.  Some are fantasies that influence my story telling.  It is clear that my imagination is rich.  It is clear that I must take the bad with the good.

I know that at some level the nightmares do not harm me.  I know that I can at times they make me sluggish or irritable.  I also know that I would not be cured of them if it meant that my imagination would be limited.  I value the good dreams too much.  I value that potential for creating something of worth more than I value sleeping soundly through the night.

There is also the aspect that if I am going to trust Christ with everything that has to include the landscape of my dreams.  No matter how horrid or difficult those dreams are I know that God is there for me.  I know that it gives me compassion for those who have it worse than me.  As with all difficulties I must assure that my first response is to seek the face of God.

Any pain or sorrow that drives of closer to the arms of God is endurable.  The reality is that dreams cannot harm me.  The imagined pain is not real pain.  The prayer and dependence upon Christ are real.  That is always a good thing.

These Dreams - Heart

Spare a little candle
Save some light for me
figures up ahead
Moving in the trees
White skin in linen
Perfume on my wrist
And the full moon that hangs over
these dreams in the mist
Darkness on the edge
Shadows where I stand
I search for the time
On a watch with no hands
I want to see you clearly
Come closer than this
But all I remember
Are the dreams in the mist
These dreams go on when I close my eyes
Every second of the night I live another life
These dreams that sleep when it's cold outside
Every moment I'm awake the further I'm away

Is it cloak 'n dagger
Could it be spring or fall
I walk without a cut
Through a stained glass wall
Weaker in my eyesight
The candle in my grip
And words that have no form
Are falling from my lips

These dreams go on when I close my eyes
Every second of the night I live another life
These dreams that sleep when it's cold outside
Every moment I'm awake the further I'm away

There's something out there
I can't resist
I need to hide away from the pain
There's something out there
I can't resist
The sweetest song is silence
That I've ever heard
Funny how your feet
In dreams never touch the earth
In a wood full of princes
Freedom is a kiss
But the prince hides his face
From dreams in the mist

These dreams go on when I close my eyes
Every second of the night I live another life
These dreams that sleep when it's cold outside
Every moment I'm awake the further I'm away

These dreams go on when I close my eyes
Every second of the night I live another life
These dreams that sleep when it's cold outside
Every moment I'm awake the further I'm away

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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