30 July 2018
Surprised by Pain ~ Opening Thoughts
Greetings Dear Reader,
I started another round of reducing and purging things over the weekend. It was a walk through some memories that both heal and haunt me. I have an ever-growing understanding of the importance of choosing carefully what we keep and discard.
That moment, when you open a box, unsure of its contents and the hose of memory floods the mind. The memories of dreams that slipped through my fingers or hopes that became shattered on the rocks of consequences are still quite jagged. I have to add to that changes that are the result of choices made by others that impact me.
Photographs, notes, and gifts of sentiment have a deep impact on me. Words written to me become sacred to me. I think I do not realize how deeply true this is until I come across them. It is one of the things that carries me through difficult times.
When I encounter words of promise and love that have turned to lies they reopens wounds that never truly heal. I read this week that you never truly get over losing someone. The context was death. I think it extends to other losses as well.
The pain that surprises me is always searing and intense. The sudden flood of memory burns through the mind demanding my full heart and rending it anew. That, however, is not where it stops. It leads me to questions that I must answer in order to regain my peace. I must find the peace in my pain or the pain will overwhelm me.
The journey this next few days will be over some thorny ground but it will also be one of possibilities. One of the first lessons I have learned is that doing this alone increases the pain. Since I must, however, do so I would value your company as I walk through it. As always, your thoughts and questions are welcome Dear Reader. We can traverse the rough terrain together and perhaps find the joy even in the difficult part of the journey.
Wishing you joy in the journey,
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
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