What Do You Fear? ~ My Doubts and Faith

Greetings Dear Reader,

A dear friend responded to my opening on this by sending the following.  I am keeping his/her name out so that the comments and not the person get the attention.  This person does not walk the path the way I do but the honesty in the comments reveals a thread that is common to us all if we are honest.  I will walk a bit slower through this to address each of them.

The Comment: “A fear I struggle with is that everything is an illusion, and that the things I've experienced are not only imagined, but meaningless. Another is that I'll abandoned by the peace I've found through spiritual and esoteric studies, as I have in the past, simply by forgetting what peace it brings me because society doesn't really allow time for those sorts of things, or give credence to them.”

The first line set me on my heels.   I actually had this conversation with a new friend over the weekend.  I guess that the first thought I take from fear based on doubt is that everyone doubts.  It is a lie to say that my faith never waivers.  It is arrogant to forbid doubt.  I think many lose faith because they are not allowed to question in faith. 

We rush to telling others that doubt is wrong when in truth when we question things with integrity we are actually acting in faith.  We are supposed to think with integrity.  That means that if we are always seeking the truth then there will be doubt, fear, and confusion whilst we sort out matters of faith.

If I seek the truth with integrity (both are necessary) then I will doubt and I will fear that I am making the wrong decision.  When Jesus was asked if it were possible to heal a sick child he was asked if it were possible.  His response was that all things are possible for those who believe.  The father’s response was “I believe, please will you help my unbelief?”

I cannot demand that anyone believe what I believe.  I cannot even insist that those who share my faith never doubt.  All I can do when doubt tries to assail me acknowledge the fear and cling to my faith.  Doubt is the other side of the coin of faith.  Honest doubt has yielded deep faith for me when I use the fear as a catalyst for following closer.  Faith is the fuel of the journey.  Without it there is no hope for me.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)