Greetings Dear Reader,
I have struggled with loneliness my entire life. I have always tried to keep those I love
close to me. Instead of building closer
ties as I wished it created resentment because of my unrecognized neediness.
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| The Forgiven - Thomas Blackshear |
If I believe what I say I believe then I have some things
that can help. I can be better at being
father and a friend if I employ some truths that I have never really embraced. The first is that the Father will be a father
to me if I let him. He will care for me
as a beloved little child. He
understands my cared and woes and even in my loneliness he will teach me how to
see him and his presence.
The second is more personal in an informational sense but
also vital. I know that all of my
children have had real faith and been doing their best to follow Christ at some
point in their lives. This means that
even if I am never with them again in this life that there is hope. Our time here is so brief and all I care
about is this: I want their hearts to
heal.
I have prayed for years that the Father would do whatever
was needed to draw them back to him.
This last year I have been praying that the Father could do whatever he
wished to me to do the same. I want to
warn you Dear Reader that this is a dangerous prayer.
My life has only one constant left in it. It is teaching me that the Father is always
there. He is showing me that my children
are really his and that he will deal with them as he needs to in order to draw
them back. In the mean time he has
decided to teach me how to be alone and that even then they are never parted
from me.
He has put things in my mind and heart that I thought I
could never accept. It is hard, painful,
and terrifying at times. It is also
awakening old dreams that are good and more connected to following Christ. I am still a lonely soul but I am learning
how to be alone. As I prepare my heart
to deal with the holy days with less family presence than I like I am comforted
with the understanding that they are with me even when they are a million light
years away. We are connected in Christ
and he moves in all of us to bring all things back to good.
I hope this thought helps you Dear Reader. It is more for my benefit as always but you
too, are someone I love and value. I
wish I could be with you more. We all need
to remember that eventually we will not longer be parted. We will no longer be lonely and afraid. Accepting that brings more comfort than I
ever thought.
Wishing you joy in the journey,
Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer
who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home
owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure
store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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