A Stone Too Heavy to Hold ~ Portable Plutonium

Greetings Dear Reader,

I am one of those writers who, when a word is wrong, I have to go back and retype the entire sentence from the point of the wrong word on almost every time.  I could simply correct the word but it just does not work for me.  It makes me wish I had this same power when I say the wrong thing.  I think the world would be entertaining if we could rewind conversations.  Once spoken, however, words cannot be called back.  They have become part of history.

Unfortunately, we all have times where there are words that we wish we had not said.  There are things we wish we had not done.  We regret having done a certain thing.  The thing is past.  The consequences will unfold.  Regret is a stone we are not meant to carry.  We are, instead, to seek forgiveness and move on toward restoration and reconciliation.  We do not do this enough. 

We dwell on the past.  We wasted creativity and time imagining what we would have done instead of what we should have said.  Regret weighs us down and often immobilizes.  It leads to depression, anger, and bitterness.  This stone, as dangerous as plutonium, is hazardous to hold for even a moment.  It radiates poison that denies the truth that we cannot live in the past.  We cannot move forward with this stone that anchors us to failures irrevocable whilst devouring the life we can have now. 

I have been working diligently on dropping the stony pattern of regret that I carried for far too long.  I made choices that were wrong.  I suffer consequences of those choices.  If I waste time on regret, I am not working on building a today that is empty of these stones.  Lay down poison regret Dear Reader. 

The method is forgiveness and faith.  We must forgive ourselves.  We must believe that the Father has all things in his hands.  We have to seek forgiveness where it is needed.  We must own our errors, realize that we cannot retype those lines, and make each moment one where we neither carry the stone of regret or do things that create new ones.  I am working at this.  It is not easy but it is good.  Stay with me and we will try to unburden each other. 

Crash-Barrier Waltzer – Jethro Tull

And here slip I --- dragging one foot in the gutter
in the midnight echo of the shop that sells cheap
radios.
And there sits she --- no bed, no bread, no butter ---
on a double yellow line --- where she can park anytime.
Old Lady Grey; crash-barrier waltzer ---
some only son's mother. Baker Street casualty.
Oh, Mr. Policeman --- blue shirt ballet master.
Feet in sticking plaster --- move the old lady on.
Strange pas-de-deux --- his Romeo to her Juliet.
Her sleeping-draught, his poisoned regret.
No drunken bums allowed to sleep here in the
crowded emptiness.
Oh officer, let me send her to a cheap hotel ---
I'll pay the bill and make her well - like hell you
bloody will!
No do-good overkill. We must teach them
to be still more independent.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn

Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a homeowner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”

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