05 January 2019

The Crucible of Time ~ The Last Time

Greetings Dear Reader,

There is a meme that makes the circuit from time to time.  “At some point in your childhood, you and your friends went outside to play together for the last time and nobody knew it”.  I cannot find the source of the quote but its value deserves recognition.

Separation by time and tide is not always known in advance.  I did not know on a Friday during my sophomore year in college that when I said goodbye to my friend Laura, that she would be dead before our lunch plans for Monday.  When I was unkind for a moment and it really hurt her feelings, I had no idea that it would be the last moment we shared in the crucible.

The fire of time and destiny burns always but sometimes it flares into painful intensity without warning.  It burns away someone we love without so much as a “by your leave.”  The crucible does not care how we feel about it.  It fiercely burns away a piece of our heart and moves on to the next moment.

We know this is true and yet we still withhold love from each other.  We see it happen and do not learn the lesson of loving in the moment.  I carry the memory and consequences of my failure to do this.  There were people I refused to interact with for what I thought were good reasons.  I am working to mend my part of the problem. 

Still there are people we claim to love with whom we will not speak with or show love.  We cannot fail to show love and claim to love.  It does not work.  We are supposed to forgive before sunset, restore in love, and endure all things for the sake of love.  When we do not we risk that flash of the crucible claiming someone we have rejected and leaving us unable to make peace, restore the relationship, or cure our own bitterness. 

We dismiss the need to forgive and heal telling ourselves we will do it when we are ready.  This is a great lie.  Failure to forgive daily gives purchase to evil.  It gives a foothold to all of the things that destroy relationships.  We argue against forgiveness with thoughts on how we will forgive when we are ready.  We tell ourselves we will heal the relationship later, forgetting that we are not even guaranteed the next grain of sand. 

We talk about the other person’s need to do this or that first.  We say as if our own wrongs have not tempted others to give up on us.  Friends and family members who we have spurned die without warning and we must carry the hateful words we left in  their ears unresolved.  We must live with knowing we owed them love and genuine forgiveness.  We are now required to endure the crucible of time without another opportunity to show that person their value and worth just because they exist. 

We rarely know when “see you tomorrow” is a lie.  I cannot afford to dwell in this crucible with hatred in my heart.  I cannot endure the thought of not doing my best to show love to everyone in every moment and then never having another moment to show that love again.  I cannot follow Christ and carry the burden of not making the most of the moments he gives me with others.

We do not know what tomorrow holds.  I urge you Dear Reader, and remind my own heart not to carry anything that resembles anger or bitterness toward anyone.  It is just too painful and heavy for this journey.  Besides, all of us know that there are memories of the last time that are good and sweet because we treated each other well.  Those carry us on the journey and protect us from the fire in which we burn.

You never thought you were together for the last time.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a home owner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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