Greetings Dear Reader,
When my younger Son,
Bezel was two, trips to the store were a guaranteed adventure. Often, when we were just inside the door of
the store, whatever store it was, he would begin a soulful mournful chant. He would look sorrowfully at me and cry “ball,
ball, ball.” He would pause for a moment
to see if a ball had appeared and then start again.
We tried several things pacify him without actually buying yet another ball. We would sneak one into the store, let someone know we brought it with us, and give it to him. Then we would go through the charade of “paying for it” and give it back to him. This worked twice. Bezel has always been smart.
I realized after months of this drama that he knew he had a
quarter-million balls at home. He simply
wanted one that he did not have. He wanted
one of the ones in the netting that was not already his. To me, this is still a vitally clear example of
envy and coveting. As someone who is a
natural “collector” of things, I battle with envy all the time.
I can justify in my mind how I will use what I covet for
good. I will easily dismiss my envy as
admiration. If you wonder what the
difference is between envy and coveting, it is simple. The first, envy is desiring to be like others
or have things like others have.
Coveting is wanting what is theirs.
Both are wrong and are products of our own dissatisfaction.
It is not wrong to want something. Our Father likes to give us good things and wishes
for us to be satisfied. Where we corrupt
it is when we put possessions, power, or position over our love for the Father
and each other. If I spend money on a
thing that I just want it is not always wrong.
There is even provision in the Law of Moses for us to use some of our
earning to purchase “Whatever our heart desires.” The catch is that I must be accountable for
what my heart desires.
The things I want are far fewer than they used to be. Possessions have for the most part lost their
shine. When I feast on the fruit of envy,
I lack gratitude for what I have and place wanting something over wanting to
love the Father. I lost sight of following
the Son because I seek something that is not at the heart of love and grace.
Again, it is not wrong to have things or want something
new. It is always wrong for me to want
any single thing over my obedience to loving the Father and his creation. The oldest possessions I have are not things
that were shiny and new. They are things
I acquired whilst adventuring toward my relationship with the Father. Jesus made it clear, Dear Reader, that if we
seek the Father and his kingdom, all that we desire that is good will be given
us.
I have to work daily to train my mind to seek the Father
first. The entire world would rather
have me want more things and be dissatisfied with them as I obtain them. Then when grace gets through, it helps me see
that all that stuff hinders my faith and following. What I must dine on is the fruit of love and
grace instead of the forbidden fruit of envy.
I will gladly share the former with you, Dear Reader.
Wishing you joy in the journey,
Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every
writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a
homeowner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure
store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Every human story is part of the great story that leads
to the Father getting everything back to Good.
Contacts for Aramis
Thorn:
#aramisthorn
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