There is Always More ~ A “Covey-Nant”

Greetings Dear Reader,

So much of how we show practical selfless love comes from our attitudes and presumptions.  What we think during an interaction yields our actions.  How we listen during a discussion yields our engagement during that conversation.

The very practical idea that I am pondering today is a covenant that I have made with myself.  Even though I fail sometimes, it is a standard that I have built upon my determination to base all things on love of the Father and you, my fellow travelers.  When I first read the statement I will quote, it resounded deeply in me. 

It has taken me years, and I still have far to go but my intention is this.  I must seek first to understand before I seek to be understood.  This idea comes from The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Dr. Stephen Covey.  When I first read the fifth habit in this book, I saw clearly how this must become a part of my internal covenant.

When we engage with others, we must truly listen.  We must make what others are saying the most important way of showing love in the moment.  When someone says to me, “thank you for really listening,” I feel that I have shown love.  It takes intention and effort.  I must be present in the moment as he or she communicates thoughts, feelings, and needs. 

If I seek to understand others, I will not have to work as hard to forge trust and communication.  Even when I do not understand, I can still be understanding.  I can always be honest and ask for more so that I can comprehend another’s needs.  People wish to be understood.  That is what creates the paradox.

Like everyone, I wish to be understood as well.  If, however, I am going to be loving, I must set aside my needs for the needs of others.  The Father will honor this as I seek to love first, understand first, and esteem others better than myself.  It hurts so deeply when I feel misunderstood and the soundings there connect to my oldest memories of pain and longing.  It then follows that the best way to show love when I am misunderstood is to seek to comprehend the position of the person who does not get me.

Think of how little Jesus was understood when he was physically on earth.  He said often how much his disciples did not understand him.  He still kept responding to us where we were at the time. He still does.  Showing practical Christ-centered love is what moves us to listen and understand.  It must be what we do with everyone.  There is always more to take in from another than we currently possess.  It is understanding the creates the ability to apply love.  So, my personal Covey-Nant is to seek first to understand before seeking to be understood.  It is there that I earn the right to be heard because people listen to people who love them.

Wishing you joy in the journey,

Aramis Thorn
Mat 13:52 So Jesus said to them, "That is why every writer who has become a disciple of Christ’s rule of the universe is like a homeowner. He liberally hands out new and old things from his great treasure store.”
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Every human story is part of the great story that leads to the Father getting everything back to Good.

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"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply." – Dr. Stephen Covey